A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:When I was 18, I thought that I was too young for many things. Now that I'm 21, I start to feel that my age is catching up. Soon, I'll be 25, which is quite old to be an air-stewardess. I only have a few years, really. I'm not good-looking and that's why I've always felt that my youth makes me feel better about it. Now that I'm getting older and I don't look any better, my confidence is getting lower. I feel awful about myself when I see younger girls with so much confidence, youth and beauty. What do I do about it? Please, help.
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female
reader, jinxx  +, writes (11 July 2012):
 Confidence, unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it) doesn't come from looking good on the outside. And even then, that's subjective to another person's taste. Youth and beauty both fade, so what you're feeling awful about really is pointless if you think about it.
Think about the women in Hollywood and all around the world who are absolutely stunning, but regularly get injections or plastic surgery. They aren't happy with themselves, not really, and they're trying to cut and shape themselves into something they think will make them happy. Will it work? I honestly don't know, but I doubt it.
What you need to do is think about the things you're happy about. What about your eyes? Your nose? Your hair? What is your personality like? What are things you enjoy doing? By focusing on so much of the negative things you think about yourself, you're basically making it impossible to have confidence. Whether you admit it or not, there is something beautiful about you. There are probably many things that are beautiful about you.
We have to live with ourselves from the day we're born til the day we die, so it's pretty important to accept and love ourselves for who we are, whoever that may be. Stop being so negative! That is where you should start. Every time you start thinking something negative, stop yourself, and replace it with something positive. Buy a new outfit, try a new hairstyle, get a manicure. Do something to pamper yourself and make yourself feel special. Know that you will forever be you, and that you're the only you the world will ever see, so why waste your time being down on yourself?
I don't quite know what to add. I had very low self-esteem for a long time, and it kind of just went away one day. I stopped hating myself and started seeing the positives. I am generally positive, so maybe it was easy for me to make the switch? I don't know, but I know I'm not perfect and that's okay. No one is, no matter how beautiful or perfect they seem to be on the outside... there's always something. We all have that something; we're all human.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2012): Believe in yourself miss, i'm sure your quite the beauty, course i look at beauty in a different way then most, listen, just be warm, and glowing when around others,smile kindly, and be nice, just, be yourself and believe in yourself, it'll be ok, twenty five isn't that old, and if your upset with your physical appearance then go walking on off time and get exercise, that's all, hope this was helpful, remember, believe in yourself, don't let yourself get down ok, it'll be alright, just stay strong and keep pushing forward^^
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