A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:So I met this guy I work with. He's 21, I'm 29. We have hung out a couple times (like 4 times either by ourselves and with other people). And I kind of like him a bit. And I have gotten the feeling he likes me too. So I texted him the other day and tried to bring up the subject. Because I was tired of waiting for him to make a move. He said he couldn't talk at that moment, and I knew he actually was busy at that moment. He said he would talk to me about it later or the following day at work. A couple days went by and we hung out 2 times and he never brought it up. So today when we hung out and the subject actually came up again and he said he was cool with just being friends. And I told him I was cool with that too. But all this time he has flirted with me, gives me long hugs and walks me to my door whenever we hang out and he drops me off at home. The other day as well as today we went out to his family's lake house with some friends and every time I stepped outside he came out with me, he kept sitting down next to me every time even though their were other available seats around. He brought out his guitar to "showcase" his talent. He texts me all the time. And even invited me out to dinner just me and him this coming week for the 2nd time. And like I said before whenever we hang out he walks me to my door and gives me these really nice long hugs. And I swear when we talk the eye contact is unbelievable. I don't get it. He acts as though he is interested but says he just wants to be friends. Am I missing something?
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female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (19 June 2012):
 He has probably learned that if he reveals his true feelings the girl will flit away from him and he will feel like a fool. So if he just keeps telling her their friends and nothing more, her interest will be peaked and she will continue to entertain him advances because she is curious and that curiosity keeps her coming back. If I were you I would simply enjoy this marvelous ride. Don't ask questions. Don't pin him down to specifics. Just be there when he is bathing you in his attention, go out to dinner with him, dance, enjoy his music and have fun. When he feels it's safe to tell you how he feels, he will. Until then don't pressure him, just let him direct this show and be available when you can. The pay off will be worth it.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 June 2012):
 He is 21, not sure what he wants. I Would say if you want a guy who is willing and ready for a relationship you might want to look at guys closer to your own age.
He can still be a friend though, but I wouldn't expect him to be ready or willing to have a relationship with you.
Besides dating in the work place and make such drama and messes.
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A
male
reader, Serpico +, writes (18 June 2012):
Just by the fact that he's 21 and you're 29, I would give it less than a 1 in 20 chance of ending in anything long term. Nothing against you, but men and woman mature at different rates and 8 years is a lot at that stage of life. Unless you are happy with a short fling, my advice would be not to pursue this.
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A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (18 June 2012):
 If he wants to see you, gives you hugs, acts interested, etc...why pressure him for an answer that means nothing anyway? Take your time, have fun, and if you're meant to be more than friends your relationship will develop that way.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2012): He's only 21, he probably doesn't want any commitment and just wants to play the field as most 21 year olds do. It sounds to me as though you 2 are looking for completely different things and you should probably spend more time with someone who's looking for the same things as you.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (18 June 2012):
 Hi
He may be interested but theres the age difference. Hes 21 and is used to having girl mates from school,also your work colleagues which is also risky if it doesn't work out. He may want to get to know you alot better to see if their is a future before he commits to anything more,he's being mature.
I would go with the flow,not expect anything more than friendship,no sex, just enjoy his company and get to know him for now
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