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I didn't enjoy kissing/snogging... Help!

Tagged as: Health, Online dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 March 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 17 April 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Hi, I am not a very confident person and have never had a relationship before but have now met somebody through a dating website and met them for the first time last night.

I had a lovely lovely time, and I really really like him, he is just so lovely!!

This is going to sound really weird and I know I am the only girl in the world who feels this way and now I just don't know what to do because I really like him!! But - I have never kissed anyone before until last night (well you know - not in that sort of a way!) and I really didn't enjoy it. I always think I have got some sort of OCD because I am obsessed by germs and everything, but the kiss was just all slimy and I dunno not my thing!!

Thing is- I know he is not very confident either and I am his first girlfriend and everything- he sent me and email this morning and one of the things he said was "My only regret from last night was not being able to give you that perfect first kiss, not knowing how to do it and all, I'm not sure if what we were doing was right, but it felt amazing!" I just don't know what to do now.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2009):

Sounds like you had a great time apart from the kiss and he admits he is inexperienced so why not meet up again and practice!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2009):

My first kiss kind of stunk. It was my bfs first kiss as well, and he really didn't seem to know what he was doing. From that point, I was very careful to keep my mouth closed and pull away when it started to get yucky. He quickly learned that what he was doing wasn't quite right, but not in a harsh way. Be subtle--say "I really like you, so i'd like to take this slow" so you start out with little kisses, and move forward at YOUR pace.

If you don't feel comfortable doing that, then I guess hel learn through experience! ;-)

Best best best of luck!!!!

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A female reader, wonderingcat United Kingdom +, writes (18 March 2009):

wonderingcat agony auntDon't worry about your first kiss.

If it helps, the next time you meet him, try having a dinner that constitutes everything that you like in taste or flavor. For the main course, avoid anything that has a strong after taste or odor, like fish, garlic/onions, read meats, hot sauces.

Then finish with desserts. If you like the taste and flavor of chocolates, have chocolate mousse. If you like strawbery, have fresh strawberry with ice cream. If you like wine, pick the kind that you like best.

That way, when you kiss again, you will be able to taste those flavors and you think less of the germs or the saliva and more of the joys of kissing! ;-)

Enjoy your next kiss!

Cat

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2009):

Hi trust me i am the same as you not very confident at all!!

never had a first kiss either and im 20 i feel silly for not having it. maybe it was like that because you were both nervous maybe you were nervous first time meeting and maybe he was nervous to try and make things so perfect.

just relax more and enjoy it it's a natural thing practice makes perfect so they say :)

:)

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