A
female
age
36-40,
*hatgothgirl20
writes:Hi.Me and my husband have been married for four months. I've always/usually have came faster than him, but I was on Lexapro for a time, and it took me longer times to cum, compared to what it used to take me. Now when we have sex, I cum really fast. He wasn't even all the way in one night, and I came like twice, and then once when he was all the way in I think. I don't mind multiple orgasms, which don't always happen, but it's weird that I cum so quickly now, faster than I ever used to before through masturbation or by any other means, even before I was on the Lexapro I did not come this fast. How can I make myself take a longer time to cum? We've tried slowing down during intercourse, but that doesn't help, because, when my body is ready to cum, it is ready to cum, regardless of whether I slow down or not. I might look up solutions for this online, but I don't want to get bogged down with a heapload of porn sites, cos I'm looking for answers, not porn.
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female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (26 November 2008):
thatgothgirl20 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Sorry people. I'm just a little frustrated. It's really not about conceiving, but that is a factor. My husband has a low sperm count, and I was reading in this pregnancy book that I have that if the woman cums at the same time as the husband, it can help.But yeah I'm just frustrated that I don't last as long as I used to, and even that amount was probably under ten minutes and sometimes more, but at least it wasn't under five minutes!!!! LOL Idk maybe I am exaggerating.I might try a little of that numbing cream, cos I think my clit is the one who is causing this quickness, but it would also be something new to try that I haven't before.Anyways, thanks for your answers, even if they were on different wavelengths than my point of view. lol
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2008): It's obvious that you want to prolong the pleasure, why not talk to someone professional? Like sex therapist. I understand where you coming from. I am sure there are technics for women as there are technics for men. Talk to a doctor
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A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (26 November 2008):
thatgothgirl20 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes, Sandman, that is what I want to do, build up.As far as intense goes, they are quick also, they don't last a while like they used to. And I am not like the average woman, when I'm done, I'm done, unless there were multiples, which like I said, doesn't happen very often. And if you are trying to conceive coming with your partner helps-to all the people who said "what is the problem?" Ugh....
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2008): Well, it kind of depends on the nature of the climax....I've had girlfriends (three, to be exact) who came very quickly, before I was right in. But they went on to have more orgasms, up to 15 or 20. The quickness to orgasm doesn't mean they were paltry orgasms. The orgasms were very nice, not rough and ready but passionate and juicy. Which is why they never caused me any problems!So I don't think you should worry about this. It's good that you can climax quickly, and then go on to enjoy more. He will love it too.
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A
male
reader, Sandman +, writes (26 November 2008):
 I really like this question.
On the one hand, I could say that this really isn't a problem. That you should count your blessings that you are able to come, AND come many times - since there are women out there who have never come or only come once a month or even less.
But on the other hand, the fact that you even asked this question leads me to believe you are somewhat troubled by what is taking place. You wish not for this to happen so that you can build up to orgasm with your husband and THEN orgasm once you've been making love for a while, right?
Well I don't know of any other way to make this not happen besides taking other types of prescription drugs which will not only cause you to orgasm slower but they may also decrease your libido. So you have to be careful of what you're asking for!
It is understandable that you want to be able to take your time with your husband and enjoy the moment. But the moment is still being enjoyed, right? How about instead of focusing on having one orgasm you focus on a new goal - try ten! Sounds ludicrous, I know. But that way, you have a new goal of pleasure to reach. Since you DO come so easily and quickly, why not make a pleasure goal out of it - just like you would if you were only having one orgasm a session. Just a suggestion.
Or, you could try to use the desensitizing creams/gels that men use to put on the penis to allow them more time during sex before orgasm. You can put a dab on your clitoris, but remember that there are other orgasm "spots" (g - spot for instance) that also cause orgasm in women. So that might not prove to be that effective.
I'm sorry, but that's all I've got. I say try to make the best of the situation. When this happens to women, it is looked at as a positive thing rather than negative as it is with men. Enjoy your orgasm - ALL of them. When your body is ready to cum, let it! And when it wants to do it again, let it! Don't try to stop your pleasure - that's what sex is for, right? Pleasure?
Hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (26 November 2008):
 Go for a multiple orgasm? As the other said, what is the problem?
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A
female
reader, miso31 +, writes (26 November 2008):
Hmm, I'm not sure I see the problem. Unlike men, we can keep on going even after we climax. It probably turns your man on even more, doesn't it? I think you're just hot for your hubby - congratulations!
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