A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my girlfriend for about 6 months. I'm in love with her(even though I haven't told her yet) and I ended up cheating on her with someone else. On top of that I was a virgin before it happened. The girl I was with was a friend of mine, we were hanging out as usual and it just happened. I didn't want to do it and I didnt plan on doing it, it just happened. I have learned from my mistake and I won't do it again. I don't know if I should tell my girlfriend or not. I know its selfish but I don't want to lose her so I haven't told her yet. I'm sure the topic of my virginity will come up later so I'm thinking I should tell her. This is the first time I've done something wrong and up to this point we've had a great relationship with no arguments or anything. What should I do?
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female
reader, Taken81905 +, writes (30 August 2007):
1st off if u love your girlfriend this would'nt have happened at all..Maybe you don't love her..but i know that you are going to have to tell her anyways an her reaction froma girls perspective isnt going to be a nice one..
A
female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (27 June 2007):
 I agree with Brandi if you truly loved your girlfriend this wouldn't have happened. maybe a kiss but then the thought of your girlfriend would stop you surely?
I would get yourself checked for STIs then seriously think about telling your girlfriend what you have done. It's not fair to hide something like this from her. You would want to know if she had done it right?
xxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (26 June 2007):
 Have yourself checked for STDs, just in case. If you're in the clear, you can decide whether to tell her. I personally think you should (because if it comes from anyone other than you she'll never trust you again -- she may still never trust you but you'll have a better shot at it if she hears it from you rather than from someplace else).
I'm assuming you haven't slept with your gf yet. Don't until you know you don't have an STD.
If you're NOT in the clear, you have no choice but to tell her, especially if you put her at risk.
And just one question: if it "just happened" even though you didn't want it, how do you know it wouldn't happen again?
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A
female
reader, Taken81905 +, writes (26 June 2007):
sorry to tell you but if you were in love with your girlfriend I don't think that wat between you and this other girl would have happen..An losing your virginity is something imortant in your life.And you just waisted it..Yeah you should tell her.An the bad part about is that your girlfriend probably loves you and she probably is avirgin too and she could have been waiting on you to lose her virginity too ..And you just went along and messd it all up
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A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (26 June 2007):
 Well i dont know if youve told her that you were a virgin when you meet. As for you cheating i reckon that you should learn from your mistake and never do it again, but the negative is if you are caught you will lose alot of trust or lose her completly. Or You can tell her and not feel the guilt, but you will lose her trust or even her completly.
There are some choices.
If she ever does ask if your a virgin tell her the truth she deserves to know, with who is up to you as it will make you relationship with her test that of you and your friend.
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A
female
reader, Brandi +, writes (26 June 2007):
 Sorry but I think that if you had true love for you gf then you would have sex with someone else that is not what love is about. you need to tell her the truth or your love for her in not true.
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