A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am a wife and mother of four young adults. Recently I can't help noticing the total disrespect with which my children and even husband speak to me at times.I don't feel im a doormat by any means nor am I a harsh person. I simply can't understand why there has been such shift. I have considered just leaving and going on a long holiday to get away from it all, but wouldn't like to put my youngest who is in his important final year at school through that stress, especially when he is probably the only one who is consistently respectful to me.I've tries talking to them, they laugh it off.Any advice Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (14 June 2012):
 Was there some triggering incident?
It's not a good sign that you say BOTH your hubby AND your kids are partaking of this behaviour.... since those (two) will feed on one-another.... WHY would hubby behave like that?????
A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (14 June 2012):
 There is very little information for us to go on here. When did this shift occur? You got on very well with everyone before this? Was anything else happening at the time (however unrelated it might appear)?
Have you changed at all? Is there something going on (good or bad) in your own life? When you spoke to them about this, besides laughing it off, what exactly did they say? Did they acknowledge it but have a reason or did they deny it entirely?
Can you give us an example of an incident (who was there, and what, if anything, was their rsponse)?
Without anything to go on, I'm going to hazard a very rough guess and suggest that perhaps your family think that in your efforts to run things efficiently they're being squeezed out and not really listened to. They might resent trying to fit int your system of things. Again, just a guess. More information would be helpful.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (14 June 2012):
 It's no lie that teens and young adults can be a challenge. They suddenly go from being mums little angels to selfish lazy backchatters who roll their eyes at everything you say or suggest and strop off slamming doors and trashing their rooms.
Coping with one is bad enough but you, poor woman have four and that's going to drive you nuts.
It's a phase they go through (just like to add that some go through it and you don't even notice and others turn into fully fledged godzillas!!!) and there isn't much you can do about it.
When I was raising teens, I don't think I have ever shouted so much in my life and getting them out of bed in the morning...god it makes me shiver just thinking about it!!!
You suddenly become their persona servant, chauffer, maid, emotional counsellor and they take take take and begrudgingly thank you if at all!!
Your hubby is probably going along with the pack...he wants to stay on the side with the greater odd of a good outcome and right now the kids are calling the shots. He don't want to stand next to you because you are taking all the flak and it's probably easier for him to give you a hard time rather than taking on the kids!!
I think it would be an excellent idea for you to take yourself off for a while and let them see what life would be like without you being their to meet their needs.
When I was a teenager, my mum went on a 6 week vacation to australia. My dad ignored the freezer full of food she'd left us and fed us on take out...we were very glad to see her when she came back and she came back with a new liberated view and we learned to do more for ourselves.
I think you should book a trip and get away fro a while.
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