A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok so lately I can't stop thinking about my neighbour. Her and her fiancé have lived next door to me and my parents for 2 years and I hit it off with both of themImmediately! They were nothing like the previous neighbours who were much older and barely spoke.Over this past year though I've started developing feelings for her. She is really attractive, really funny and always says hello and stops to chat. And even though I'm 6 years younger than her (she is 31-im 25) we have loads in common and I swear she sometimes flirts with me.I've started to note down the time she gets home from work so I can ensure I'm out the front working on my car or having a smoke just so we can have a quick chat.I thought it was just a crush and I'd get over it but my feelings just get more and more intense. She is my ideal woman and each time I see her with her fiance (who is a top guy, he always says hi and chats) I feel gutted. Also when I'm out on dates and stuff the girls are nice enough but they aren't her and I spend all evening wanting to get home just to see if she is around.Do I have any chance with her? Or am I just wasting my time? How do I know if she feels the same way too? Cheers
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crush, fiance, flirt, neighbour Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2013): I think it's a crush.., I used to be the same when I was in my early 20's- used to have the biggest crush on my neighbours son. I pretty much did like you & made excuses to be in the back garden when he was just to chat.
He then moved out- I was gutted but time passed & I got over him & then I moved out of home & life goes on.
She sounds like a genuinely nice person- does she act the same with the other neighbours? Or just give you special attention ? I'm guessing she's friendly with everyone so keep her friendship but realise that's all it will ever be x
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (27 December 2013):
 Yes, you're wasting your time. She's older and engaged and she's probably just a sweet, friendly person and you're mistaking that for being flirtatious. Sorry to be blunt but you don't really have a chance with her so just get over it. Instead, focus more on girls who are available and single. You seem to have closed all your options and have elevated your neighbor to your dream girl's status. Happens....and you'll get over it, if only you give other girls a chance.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (27 December 2013):
 It is a crush. And it's not realistic. I think she knows you fancy her and she find that pleasing, but more like awww puppy-love then OH hubba hubba!
Or she is actually OBLIVIOUS to your crush and just TRYING t obe a good and sweet neighbor. Since this is probably her and her fiances FIRST home they are new to the whole how to be good neighbors without making it more then it is.
She might be what you THINK is your ideal woman, but she ISN'T the one for you. For the simple REASON that she is engaged and seemingly happy with her man.
At least, you know what you are looking for in a woman and that is a GOOD start. Now you just have to ACCEPT that she is off limits and you need to find YOURSELF a single lady to woo, chase, date and love. SHE isn't it.
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (27 December 2013):
 I'm afraid I think she's just being friendly. She may just have a really outgoing, bubbly personality that you are mistaking for flirtatious.
Besides, she has a fiance. Imagine if she was your girl. Would you appreciate it if some time guy came along and wanted to try to steal her way?
If I were you, I'd back it off a bit. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, M Proops +, writes (27 December 2013):
Well she has a fiancé who she's commited to marry,you should not be pursuing her.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2013): You're wasting your time completely. She probably sees you as a "kid" seeing as she's 31 and set up home with her future husband while you're still living with your parents. Her chats to you are polite, your crush on her is making you think she is flirting, when I imagine she is just a nice lady.
Everyone wants an easy life when they're at home and most people will have friendlt, neighbourly chats to ensure they have a good rapport with the people they live nearest too. It just makes life easier than ignoring everyone.
She's never going to be with you, so you need to face facts and enjoy the dates with girls you do stand a chance with. You just need to get to know them better to realise who is better suited to you.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (26 December 2013):
 It's a one sided crush. Some people are natural flirts. You didn't say she was touching you or hugging you. Even if you get a chance it would be cheating, and you wouldn't want to be with a cheater anyways. Your ideal woman is not taken. She's somewhere else and it takes time to find her. Yes you are wasting time. Before you clear her off your mind you are stopping yourself from looking for the right one.
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