A
male
age
36-40,
*daminio
writes:I had a long term relationship end about 4 years ago.It ended not the best, and I was silly enough to stay in contact with the ex.Anyway I know she has changed and also I couldn't see her the same again. But I can't seem to meet another girl I click with or see as amazing. I know people have flaws and you can love them for it, but I'm just picky... I did have a gf for a few months but then she kept saying she really liked me... but I knew I didn't like her as much. Since then I do meet girls I like briefly but then are put off because either they have a light moustache, or they go up town drinking too much... It's doing my head in because i just want another normal fun relationship again and not dwell on this old one.. Is it a confidence thing?
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female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (27 April 2013):
Thanks for the follow much appreaciated.Wishing you a happy future. Best Luck Nora B.
A
male
reader, adaminio +, writes (25 April 2013):
adaminio is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys for the input.. maybe one day I will be able to move forward. Thanks again!
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A
female
reader, inkmouse  +, writes (21 April 2013):
I've been in a similar situation. You need to ask yourself what you're getting out of staying in contact with the ex. If you find yourself stuck thinking about the way things used to be and how great you were together, regardless of your feelings towards her now, it's going to warp your perspective on any other potential relationship. You can't dwell on relationships from the past- especially long term ones because we don't see them clearly. Often we can only remember the good times and the times we got along because we miss them- and of course no one else can live up to this "perfect relationship". You need to realize that there was a reason it ended. They had flaws and things that bothered you. Maybe she had bad breath in the morning or maybe she did something that really bothered you... These things tend to be looked over in our memories of them.
My advice would be to cut her off. I really think this is your issue, not so much self confidence but if you go much longer without being able to find anyone that makes you happy your self confidence WILL suffer. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, NORA B +, writes (21 April 2013):
Its nor easy to heal after a relationship of 4 years.Try and not be so hard on yourself give your yourself time and space maybe take time OUT of the dating scene for awhile.As you stated you are picky when you come to girls and that is fine for you However do you think that maybe that your not ready to date right now.Give it time and be gentle with yourself. Time sort all out. Kind Wishes Nora B.
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