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female
,
anonymous
writes: iam in a ld for a year and a half everything's fine i just moved out coz i get a better job, my bf is still hunting for a good job.the problem is i cant adjust to the new workplace no friends no relatives. i am in a alien world to top it all i have become increasingly snappy for the silliest of reasons, my bf is very understanding, i always thought everythings gonna be fine but things arent workin out the way i want to. what to do? plz help
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female
reader, Sexybum  +, writes (27 December 2006):
 Hiya
Relationships always go under strain when there is one half of the couple looking for work. It always causes more pressure for the couple and you can only stand this pressure for so long before it all starts to comes out. With you all the stress of finding a new job and settling into it, as well as the build up to christmas and as you said the not having family around has finally taken it's toll and your are stessing at your boyfrind because of this.
Why is it that you can't settle into your job? Is it the job that you wanted or do you think it might be that you feel guilty having the job because your bf is still looking for one. Whatever the reason is you need to identify it and tackle it. This problem needs to be dealt with as it is very important as your job is your source of income. When you are happier at work then you will be in the position to tackle the other things that are bothering you.
I would suggest that you seek some counselling help. Some people are unsure of counselling but what they can do is take a complicated situation like yours and help you to work through it bit by bit and they help you work through it in the right order. If you are succesful it won't be long before you will be wonderring what the actual problem was in the first place. Another good thing about counselling is it will not only help you with your current situation but will teach you life skills. What you take from the counsellor will stay with you for the rest of your life. You haven't got anything to loose by trying it.
Good luck and let me know what you think
SB xoxox
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