A
female
age
41-50,
*s5900
writes:I was with my exboyfriend for 2 years. We lived together and were seriously talking about marriage. I made a huge mistake and moved out. I was really stressed out and thought he was the cause. Now that I have moved out, I am miserable and want him back. He did not want to break up at first so we still spent alot of time together after we initially broke up. After hanging out for a couple weeks, he was acting very distant. So, I asked him if he was moving on or was if he was still confused about things. With hesitation, he told me he was moving on. This crushed me! I contacted him about 5 days later and asked if he would come over to my place to talk. He was more than willing to talk. I told him all that I had realized about our relationship/break up and why things had ended up the way they did. I also provided a couple of suggestions on how we could make it again. While I was explaining all this to him, he started crying and gave me a big hug. He tols me he wasa very happy that I had told him what I had realized and that he was really proud of me. He gave me another big huge as he was leaving and told me that he would be in touch. Has he really moved on? Or is he just trying to think everything through? Why would he cry if he has already moved on? Im confused!
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male
reader, Athleticmind +, writes (17 December 2009):
Giving someone space is good. How long you wait depends on a couple things. First, how long has it been? If we're talking just a few days, or maybe even a week, then maybe consider waiting a bit longer. If it's already been a couple weeks, and you really do want him back then make a plan to see him and attempt to convince him to spend some time with you. Secondly, since you're the one who broke off the relationship originally, perhaps, you ought to be the one to take the extra effort to convince him you are the one for him...don't make him take risks not knowing if you migfht do this break-up stuff again.
But last of all, remember this: there are tons and tons of great guys out there. If this relationship fizzles, another one will materialize soon enough.
A
female
reader, ts5900 +, writes (16 December 2009):
ts5900 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIf he does still care and possibly wants to reunite, how long should I wait? I am currently not contacting him to give him some space to figure things out. As he left my house the last time I saw him, he said he would be in touch. How long does it usually take guys to think and figure things out?
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A
male
reader, Athleticmind +, writes (16 December 2009):
When someone breaks off a relationship hurt follows. When that person realizes doing so was a mistake trying to change what is already done can be challenging. My guess is that your boyfriend was crying because of his loss. Even though yoiu may insist that he and you can be together again, he may not trust you. Despite his wanting to "make it work with you," he is now worried that he may get hurt again. It's possible, and I'm only guessing here, but perhaps, when you were previously with him, your relationship was based more on "romance" and less on "friendship." If that is/was the case, consider getting to know him as your friend first, and then see if a mutual romance is still in the cards.
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A
female
reader, agonyaunt sierra +, writes (16 December 2009):
aww he "what it looks like" misses you to,i dont think he would cry and move on hes sad , did you tell him you want to be together again? but either way i think he wants you to.. just start hanging near him more :)
make it the way it was befor (without the whole marrige thing" dont talk about that.. let him bring it up
Good luck!
pls rate my awnser 10! im try ing to become a agony expert!
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