A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok recently I realised that I'm in love with a friend I've been crazy about for months...The problem though, is that we're not together and that kills me...She claims to be crazy about me too...I mean before our first date she told me she wanted to be with me more than anything, but after that date she didn't talk to me for nearly two weeks after...And when she finally did, she said she didn't want to be with me...I mean seriously, play with a guys head much?...It hurt quite a bit cos I had put myself on the line again for someone and she just tossed me aside like I was nothing..Of course I dont know exactly what was going through her head...But the line she fed me has been fed to me before, "I need to learn to be happy with me, It's not like I'm going to date anyone else"..The last time I heard this, the person who said it was dating someone within 2 weeks...Now I know everyone is different, and she might actually mean it, but now even our friendship has suffered...We barely talk anymore and that makes it worse, not being able to talk to the person I love...So last night I did something drastic...I contacted her and told her I'm done with the 'crush'...And that we should both just forget about it...I really regret it now but I put a lot of thought into calling it all off...I maybe hurting bad and I hate this feeling but as long as she can be happy, I can live with the pain...I don't really know what my question is, I kinda would like some opinions though... Reply to this Question
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female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (7 June 2012):
 I agree with HoneyPie...people pull away for a reason...regardless of what the reason really is. Maybe she does have someone else...if she does...she is doing you a favor and not leading you on. People who really want to be together don't play games or have doubts. They don't constantly question "Do I like her? Don't I like her? Is she with someone else? etc". I think you did the right thing...you are just second-guessing yourself like everyone does. It is hard if you like someone to break all ties.
A
male
reader, Tom Obler  +, writes (7 June 2012):
 Hi,
From what I read, I believe you did the right thing. No more games and waiting on someone to change their mind or want to be with you. You may hurt now but you have got rid of a headache. A big headache. The problem is if she liked you the same way she would not have hesitated. My advice now is take the short term hurt and then never look back. But what was her reaction to your call?
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A
female
reader, Momma bear +, writes (7 June 2012):
I've been in your situation. too many times. Both ends, your end and hers.
This whole thing with "I maybe hurting bad and I hate this feeling but as long as she can be happy, I can live with the pain..." that's is not fair.
If you love her you will fight for her. If you regret telling her the crush is over it wont help anything if she actually does have feelings for you.
You could be losing your chance to being with her.
Walk over to that house knock on her door bring her one flower and tell her you love her and you won't leave until she admits she feels the same.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (7 June 2012):
 Give her and yourself some space. If she REALLY liked you the way that you like her, I don't think she would have pulled away.
That is the risk you take when going from friends to maybe a couple. You risk losing that friend.. and gf/bf.
I'm sorry you are hurting, but I think it's a good idea to work on getting over that crush. I think you said that you were done with the "crush" to get a reaction or a rise out of her and you got nothing.
Time to let her go.
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