A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I was with my ex for 2 1/2 years. We had a good relationship.. barely ever fought. I think we both just started getting bored with the relationship and decided to go our separate ways. Right after we split I regretted the decision and tried to fix things but he wasnt having it. Its been 2 months since the break up and we still are in contact with eachother... just text messages now and then... nothing really important. I try to not initiate any of the contact bc i dont want to seem needy and dependent on him. We met up one time and he said it felt so good to come and see me and tried to get me to tell him i missed him but i didnt want to put myself out there to get hurt again so i didnt say anything. I miss him so much and do not know if i should let him know or how i should go about trying to make things work again. I feel like he is starting to slip away and it is killing me.
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male
reader, rcn +, writes (11 March 2009):
 What if he is playing the same game you are, by fearing the answer? You haven't told him, and it seems as if he hasn't told you. So, one of you needs to stand up and say what you want.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the response it helped.. I will prob let him know how I feel.. I don't want to wonder what if.. but if he wanted to get back together don't u think he would have said something to me?
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (10 March 2009):
Why do you see feelings as being needy? You keep this wall in between, you'll continue getting further and further apart. You may end up loosing him for good, because you are afraid to tell him how you feel.
Love is not being dependent. Wanting to be with someone is not being needy either. Their is a difference, but we often associate them as being the same.
My recommendation is NO BEGGING, but be honest and tell him how you feel. It's not about being dependent or needy, it's about being honest. What does he give to you, that you desire being with him? Whatever it is, you miss it, so be honest and tell him.
If it was boredom, you both created it to be that way. You choose the direction of your relationship. If you want it to be exciting, make it exciting. If you get back together, don't start where you left off, start it new.
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