A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am seeing a guy for two months and i found out that he texted his ex last week saying how much he misses her and how she would feel if he got a new girlfriend. Ex said it'll be weird but nothing I cant get over and I'll be happy for you. He replied back saying if its in God's plan we will get back. I confronted him and he said hes sorry and it was cause he was drunk and he will never contact her again. I asked him to defriend her and delete her number. Am i being too unreasonable by asking him to do these things?ps. he said he will unfriend her but later on changed his mind and said he will deactivate his fb. I feel like hes just deactivating it so that he doesnt have to unfriend her and later on when he activates it again he will still be friends with her.
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (21 April 2014):
 Everyone else said what I was going to say as well.
HE isn't over her. DEMANDING he deletes her number is not going to make the relationship work. You have ONLY been together for 2 months and he is already reaching out to the ex. Do you really think him deleting the number is going to change how he feels? Or that he would actually delete the number?
Just walk away. 2 months is enough time wasted on him.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2014): I am going with all the other female anon posters. You're wasting your time with him and he wants her back.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2014): He is not over her, you are waisting your time. They will be back together
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A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (19 April 2014):
 OP, when you discovered those texts (were you snooping?) you should have immediately dropped him. No arguments, no big scene, no blaming or finger pointing, no crying or carrying on. You should have just gracefully walked away.
He wants back with his ex and he's been corresponding with her behind your back. Promises and reassurances mean bubcus. He's not the one for you. Sticking around will just undermine your trust in yourself, your trust in others and it's toxic to your well being.
You've only been dating for two months and while it may be a big disappointment, it isn't a life altering catastrophe. There should have been no big investment at this early stage.
This is really a no brainer.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (19 April 2014):
 You can ask the guy to un-friend this woman from facebook and delete her number but how do you know what he's thinking in his heart of hearts? How do you know that he's over her for good?
As of now he isnt and I dont think you should hang around, waiting for the day IF and WHEN he decides to get over her. He clearly wants her back. She is in his mind, not you. Do you really want this guy to hurt you even more? Its not too late, just leave.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2014): He's not serious about you, as you can see for yourself. Don't waste your time
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (19 April 2014):
 You should listen to your intuition on this one, it is telling you he has no intention of unfriending her on facebook, or deleting her number.
I don't accept the excuse "I was drunk" its an excellent little excuse for getting people of the hook, if the other person will accept it.
He wants her back, so where does that leave you? Just hanging around with a guy who not only doesn't love you, but doesn't respect you either.
Let him keep his ex's number, and let him keep her on his facebook list, and you delete him, from your phone, from facebook and from your life .... this guy is not the one for you.
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (19 April 2014):
 Hi, CaringGuy is 100% correct you need to let this guy go, he is only with you because he cant get the ex. I can rest assure you he has stronger feelings for her, pining for her and will leave as soon as he can get back with the ex. Not what you want to hear and it probably hurts but its the truth. He has unresolved feelings and this relationship is built on egg shells. Don't do this to yourself and don't let him convince you otherwise, that message says a thousand words that he will not verbalise to you.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (19 April 2014):
You're being unreasonable to yourself.
You shouldn't be asking him to delete her number. You should be deleting his. His texts are showing that you are the rebound and he really wants his ex back. the fact he claim to be have been drunk is no excuse, and shows the lack of respect he has for your and your feelings.
This man, after 2 months, has shown he wants his ex back. He's using you as a rebound until he thinks than can happen. Get rid of him now whilst you can, before he hurts you.
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