A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I took this girl out on a casual lunch date 3 days ago. Everything went pretty well, she's really sweet and we got along nicely.. at least I thought so. Yesterday my friend had a barbeque at his house, and I invited her to come along. Nothing too crazy, just threw the idea out there in a text message. But she never responded! It's been over a day, I tried calling her once but no answer... I mean, if I screwed something up wouldn't it at least make sense to tell me what I did wrong? I haven't called or texted her since yesterday because I don't want to be pushy, but should I at least ask her if I did or said something that would make her completely stop talking to me altogether? Life really kicks your dick in the dirt sometimes man, shit.
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female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (27 August 2012):
 I think you've done enough and its time to let go now. You initiated it twice and she didn't respond both times. That's in-your-face rude but its a tactic that girl's employ when they want a guy to back off without having to tell them that. I'm not proud of it, I've done it myself too!
You only went on one casual lunch date so she doesn't really owe you an explanation of why she thinks its not working out. One date doesn't give you that.
I say just accept it as one of those things that just didnt work out and move on. You didnt do anything wrong, you probably just didnt click with her and that's it.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2012): Nah don't ask her if you did something wrong. That would come off just as pushy as if you kept calling her. Just relax and act cool. Maybe she had to work. Maybe she had a migraine and was sleeping all day. Maybe she was out with her friends. I mean you don't know for a fact that her not returning your call has anything to do with you. Furthermore, you do not want to let her know that thought even crossed your mind. So just relax and stay cool. Give her a couple of days and if she still doesn't get back to you, try calling her one more time. And if she doesn't answer or get back to you then let it be.
She may come around. She may not. You certainly shouldn't sit around waiting for it. And don't take it so personally. You don't know how many frogs the average person has to kiss to meet the right one. So take it lightly and know there will be other chicks.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (26 August 2012):
 Sometimes dates just don't work out. She may have not been having as good a time as you. Yes it's rude to not respond, but I doubt it would have really felt that much better to be told she's not interested either. Not hearing back sucks because it's rejection more than anything. There are not many people on the planet who would give a detailed description of what you could have done better or worse. Likely the chemistry just wasn't there.
You can take Cerberus' suggestion and text her once more, just "how are you?" Or something and see what happens. If you don't hear anything though, it's time to move on.
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (26 August 2012):
Leave her now. You did nothing wrong: she probably didn’t get the message. If she did and just didn’t bother answering, that’s rude. You have now called her, it’s down to her to make the next move. If she is ignoring you, that reflects badly on her, not you.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2012): "Life really kicks your dick in the dirt sometimes man, shit."
Ah the warm glow of early dating over-analysis and nervousness, I don't miss it haha.
First things first, did you invite her on the day or give her plenty of notice? Because it's generally not a good idea to spring that on someone with no notice, some people need like to know what they're doing well in advance so they can ready, especially girls when it comes to dating because they obviously want to have to time look their best most of the time.
Look she didn't respond and that was quite rude but if was on the day OP, then she may have panicked a little if not then it's not a good sign.
I'd give her one more chance. I'd send her a "how are you?" on tuesday and ask her if she'd like to meet up next weekend. Try not automatically assume the worst, she may have had good reason for it and you just never know. Give her another go, let her know you're interested and would like to see her this weekend and you'll know for sure what the deal is then. No reply again, then screw her.
OP just don't make a big deal out of this, it doesn't necessarily mean anything bad. Give her one more shot.
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