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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi I have a question well its two questions really. I like my older brothers friend and I think he likes me, I'm unsure what to do about it because number one he's my brothers friend and I'm not so sure that it would be good as it could jeopardise their friendship if it didnt work out. Also I'm in my 20's but I am still a virgin and I am two years older than him and he is sexually active so I'm worried that he may have a problem with my inexperience, any advice on whether I should make a move or not and what to do about the lack of sexual experience??
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female
reader, Sexybum  +, writes (29 March 2006):
 I don't think you should try and start any type of relationship with your brothers friends if it is only in order to have a sexual experience. The relationship would be worthless and I doubt it would make you feel any better.
If you guys really like each other, I mean more than just wanting sex, then sure you should hook up. Like Irish said yuo do run the risk of upsetting your brother, but if they are good mates then he will understand. You do also have to understand you would be likely to see him still if your relationship didn't work out, because he's yur brother's mate.
If you start a relationship then you should be completely honest to him about your anxieties and experience. This way he can be sensitive towards you and treat you appropriately. This goes for any relationship you start whether its with this guy or any other. You deserve to enjoy loosing your virginity withthe other person understanding how much it means to you. If you are not honest you may well regret it later on. Its a natural part of life, nothing to be ashamed about, soemthing quite special, and its that specialness that you deserve to experience. Take it from someone who knows if you don't open up you could regret it later on. Once you've lost your virginity you'll never get it back and never have the chance to share it again, make it special.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2006): Call me a square...butI find it surprising that you are actually worried about your sexual experience, in reference to a guy, you are not even dating yet. I realize that when a woman dates a man, eventually, down the road...a sexual relationship will likely come about. But it's as if, you are wasting time worrying about what type of sexual experience you have.. to bring to the table to offer HIM...'before' you even date him. If you do date and you both bond, click and build a substantial relationship based on mutual trust and respect, your lack of sexual experience will not make a world of difference to him or any guy who loves you...because they will love you for YOU. Remember that. Now if he's your brother's friend...you do take the risk that if it doesn't work out for you and this guy-your brother's friendship with him could be compromised, dependant on personality types. Your brother could be upset with him as some over protective brothers can be.....or if not, you will always run the risk of running into this guy you dated, because in all likelihood, their friendship would carry on. If you think you can live with that...then go for it. It's your call butjust remember-to uphold yourself and value yourself enough, not to worry about your sexual experience. It shouldn't matter. Good luck
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