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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: hey.i have been with my boyfriend now for a little over a year and we have stated having sex. we have only been exually avtive for about 6 weeks and its ok so far. but my boyfriend recently asked me if i would like to perform some role plays with our sex lives and make things a little more fun. meaning like trying out a rape role. this was the only one he came up with. like pretend to rape me by blind folding me and taking full controll ofmy body. i love him to bits and maybe would like to try it as i know i love him and he loves me. but i was raped a few years ago. i was 13 and a boy i was seeing at the time had a few friends that had me in this guys bathroom but thats another story and i dont want to talk about it. the thing im trying to say it. im scared of doing this rape roleplay although i think it could be fun and interesting i dont know wether i should because of what happened to me.? do you think i will be ok with it. should i tell him i was raped or should i just leave it out and not bother doing the roleplays?? can anyone understand and help? thanx x Reply to this Question
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male
reader, TomWilkinson  +, writes (22 November 2007):
 I agree with Mistify, you should tell yourr bf that you were raped and that doing this roleplay would be uncomfortable for you. He should totally understand, I had a girlfriend who had been raped and sex in genral was an issue for her at first.
Sit down and talk about it, being blindfolded and letting him be in total control does not have to be a rape type situation, make it sensual, lots of kissing, gentle touching. Remember, if you do want to try this, you could easily tell him to stop at any time if you feel uncomfortable.
A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (22 November 2007):
I know naturally as a lady you would do anything to please your man but if you won't be comfortable with it i can assure you,you won't enjoy it.Firstly,if you really want role playing suggest other styles you may be comfortable with.Then depending on how you feel tell your man of what happened in the past.If he loves you,he'll understand and not do anything that makes you feel like you are in da past.Telling him about such serious past occurences will boost his trust in you.However,you have no obligation to tell him what happened.
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A
female
reader, Mistify  +, writes (22 November 2007):
 I totally understand your situation, and your fears are totally warranted. I think you need to have an honest SIT down with your boyfriend, and tell him the truth. Tell him that you are interested in the role-playing, and you are up for many new experiences, but that you don't think the rape - scenario is such a great idea. You need to be honest with him about this. By your question - it seems as if you are unsure how this scenario will affect you - because of your horrible experience. This should be answer enough, that you shouldn't do this SPECIFIC role play. Try and think of another couple of scenario's and then discuss them with your BF.
Good luck...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2007): I think you should definitely tell him what happened. If he's not a jerk he'll sympathize and stop bringing it up. Then, if you decide for sure that you want to try it, you can tell him you're willing to try it if he promises to stop if you're not enjoying it (and I don't mean pretending not to enjoy it, you should make a word to say when you really do want it to stop).
In the meantime, you can get used to roleplaying by doing different games. Be creative and try to make some up yourself.
Make sure your boyfriend understands how you feel. I'm surprised you haven't told him already. If I were having sex with someone I'd be at the point where I could tell them anything. Good luck, I hope things work out for you and I'm sorry for the horrible experience you had.
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A
female
reader, muffy  +, writes (22 November 2007):
 well if you really love this guy and have bin with him for a long time,if hes never done anything to hurt you or make you upset, then hes trustworthy.if you really love him then trust him and things might work out for the best.plus if it sounds fun then do it.you should tell him what happend to you because therr should be no secrets between you for a healthy relationship.and if the role playing thing works then tell me cuz i wanna try it lol.
i really hope i helped.
luv and kisses
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