A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my boyfriend on and off since high school, almost 4 years. He is a year older then me. We are both our the only people we have ever dated and our first loves. He used to hook up with a lot of different girls before he met me.Our first year together was amazing we spent all our time together, and because of this I lost almost all of my friends and of course he didn't because that doesn't happen to boys, so when he wants to spend the night with his boys I don't have anyone to hangout with, he of course doesn't understand this and thinks it's pathetic. I used to have great confidence, but because he has become verbally abusive and don't have many friends to talk to my self esteem has become low.Two summers ago we got into a fight and I broke up with him. A week later he hooked up with one of my good friends. When I found out, my heart was broken. I stopped talking to him and that friend, and started hanging out with another guy. When he found out about the other guy he trying everything to try to get back together with me. We both went away to different schools that year, we got back together three months later. We both cheated on each other a couple weeks later. Broke up again, then got back together a few months later. We both love each other so much that we keep forgiving eachother. We don't have a lot of trust in each other. He has recently started to become less affectionate, doesn't like to hold my hand and has become verbally abusive, for example calling me fat, and a loser and telling me to get friends, and is always ditching me for his friends. I know I should break up with him but I love him and I am scared that he will find another girl.
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (19 October 2009):
Think about this very carefully. Why on earth would you want to get with a guy who abuses you? You are better than that. He is controlling you, because he knows that you are vulnerable and will come back. That's what guys like this do. He sees you as nothing but something to play with and hurt. He doesn't love you, he never will. You know you have to leave him. So leave him. After all, what happens when rather than verbally abusing you, he hits you? Get out now while you still have the chance to and never speak to him again, or put up with a life where you will be third best and nothing but unhappy.
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