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I am happy dating the wrong person

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Question - (21 August 2015) 4 Answers - (Newest, 22 August 2015)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I recently started seeing a guy who is quite my type physically but in other aspects no. Even as much as he has shown me his bad sides which include taking my money and not returning it. Telling me we must have sex or he can't see me. I still like him. Could this be lust or should I just walk away from it. I am torn. I am happy where I am with him.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2015):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

@notsohappy,you are very right. I have spent most of my life looking for the perfect man, couldn't find any. Then I decided why not carve mine from an existing one which Infact is what you said "taming this guy". I thank you all for all advice and have made up my mind to move on. I have been down this lane before and don't want to thread this lane again(hopefully I would cut him off). Thanks

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (21 August 2015):

CindyCares agony aunt OP,...seriously ?... There's not much that can surprise me by now, both in life and on DC, but,frankly, when I read your post I just wondered if maybe where you live there's a summer heat wave that has been impairing your judgement. Brains do not function at their best in unusual wheather conditions.

Yeah, of course this can be just lust, in fact most probably is ! That's not the problem, if you are single, and do not harm anybody, and use protection...you are sort of entitled to your lusty moments . If you are not the type who feels demeaned by being wanted for sex only, and this does not bother you (... but I guess it DOES bother you , otherwise you would not even be posting about it to begin with ), one would say, why not, go ahead and have fun.

BUT,this guy TAKES your money and does not return it,...and you want to reward this appalling behaviour by giving him sex on tap according to his terms and conditions ?...

Btw, haven't you thought that maybe the big attraction on his side comes precisely from the fact that he can get money out of you ? ( whether he asks for it and you are too weak to say no, or he takes it forcibly - which I hope it's not the case ). I know it's not a very flattering thought, but it's a logical one, seeing as he is surely not very interested in you as a person, - and seeing that you have just taken up with him recently, so he can't use the excuse that he feels comfortable taking money from you since by now you are such good buddies.

My advice : you want a purely physical relationship , no complications, just feel-good endorphines ?... Ok, whatever works for you, surely there's no law against casual sex - but at least choose someone who gives his services FOR FREE !

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2015):

he is just wasting your time and as you are young you are figuring you have time to waste,but when your friends are all coupled down and you are worn out and discarded you will kick yourself, but at least you will have plenty of empty space to kick yourself in.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2015):

If you're happy and aware....

My advice is to walk away. But you have to want to help yourself first before anyone else can help you or give you advice. Otherwise, it's just a waste of our time, really.

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