A
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I had a bit of a fling type, a while ago and ended up liking him (which was stupid). That ended and he got a girlfriend but told me he wanted to stay "friends". I agreed even though I hated it. I didn't talk to him as much because it was too hard. A few months into his relationship he starts texting and flirting with me like we used to before. I told him it wasn't fair and that I thought he said he wanted to be friends. He said he does but he "just can't say no" to me. He lives in another town (that was his excuse for us not being able to have anything more than a FWB thing) but was visiting his home town (mine also) and asked if I wanted to stay over at his place. I said "no" and after that he was kind of off with me. I'm seeing someone else now and he said something like "wouldn't want to upset your boyfriend would we"? Also, before people say it's because he's not getting sex from his girlfriend, I know that there's no way that he would date a girl that doesn't put out. Why is he being like this? I'm just fed up and don't know what to do.
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female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (14 September 2011):
What are you precisely fed up with, with him hitting on you,.. or with him being standoffish after you don't put out?
Are you fed up with him tryng too hard.. or not tryng hard enough ?
If it's the first, there's an easy solution. Ignore him, don't answer back, or , even better, block him completely. Get rid of him.
If it's the second, well , his behaviour is not so mysterious , you can safely assume that 95% of the times the " let's stay friends " thing is all crap. He does not want your friendship, he could not care less about it, he just wants to get into your pants again. After all , it's not as if you ever were best friends in the past, it was a fling type thing, - based on casual sex . So , casual sex is what he wants now, same as he wanted before; only, calling it " friendship " sounds nicer and fools you better.
If instead you wonder why is he hitting on you while having a girfliend, ... that's lamentable but pretty common too. There's a lot of people around who have trouble being faithful.
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