A
female
age
30-35,
*otcookie100
writes:i am dating a guy that is 37 yrs older than me. i love him like i never loved anyone else and he loves me the same way or even more. my question is: Is it okay that i am dating a guy 37 yrs older than me? we have plans on moving in together but idk if people are going to accept that we love each i think people are going to say i am a gold digger but i am not with him for money...he works i work i pay for my bills he pays his i am with him because i love him. please help me i know i want to be with this guy for the rest of my life but i am scare wat people might say or do....answer my question and give me advice. thank you
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male
reader, bruce lee  +, writes (28 September 2010):
 It sounds a bit over-the-top. 37 years age difference is pushing it a bit. But it's fully your decision.
If I was to date a woman 37 years older than me she would be aged around 67 to 72 years old.
The maximum age difference for any serious relationship (in my book) would be maybe 17 years.
But as I say, it's your call. Take care and God bless.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2010): He wants a caretaker and you will not feel the same about him when he is 85 years old when he really needs a caretaker. Even he doesn't expect this to last but he's having fun while it does. He's not thinking about you but himself. Your family will be devastated and rightfully so. don't ruin your life this way. You deserve so much more! Be kind to yourself and run.
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A
female
reader, hotcookie100 +, writes (25 September 2010):
hotcookie100 is verified as being by the original poster of the question thank you to everyone comments it made me more sure that i love this guy and if it only last 10 yrs i don't care i know i found my true love and that wat matter...not everyone find true love i can honestly say i did and that i am lucky i did thank u god and everyone that comment :)
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A
male
reader, The old Man? +, writes (25 September 2010):
 Love has no age restrictions! If the two of you are happy, go for it!
Yes, you will hear the "gold digger" crap and the other snide comments that go along with an inter generational relationship. It just shows peoples ignorance.
The bit about when you're 40 he'll be 87, yeah, so what! Do we really know what life has in store for us? I hate to sound morbid here, but the reality is, none of us know how long we will live. We just assume that we will see some ripe old age. If you read the paper you see auto accidents taking people on a daily basis.
Let's go back to happy now.
You only have one life to live.
Live happily! If the two of you are in love and fulfill each others dreams and desires,,
This old man says: GO FOR IT!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2010): PRO: Listen. Age shouldn't matter when two people are in love. I mean, there will always be people that will judge and look down towards this situation but what's important is that you don't discourage yourself.
CON: I have to agree that being in a relationship that has a longevity of 37 years apart is pretty sketchy and risky. They have mentioned that when you'll be around 40 years of age, he will be 77. He will need to be pampered (fed, taken to the bathroom, give him a shower, put his clothes on for him and so on), you would be basically become a caretaker throughout this relationship. It's YOUR choice and that's what counts and you shouldn't feel discouraged from those around you. You are his girlfriend, not his mother.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2010): Live for the moment - yes. It is none of anyone's business what you do. You have to accept two things though. Firstly people do judge based on what they consider 'social norms'. Secondly, whilst everything is ok now things will change when this guy is much older so if you are 20 years old now and he is 57.... when you are 40 years old (hardly considered old) he will be 77. Think about the longevity of this and whether you are open minded about how things could work out. If the relationship lasts 10 years (I'm being harsh on purpose here) then you are still young enough to look for another partner and possibly have children - if indeed that is what you want. We never know what life will hold but it helps to plan what we can when we can. You clearly love this man - that counts for a great deal.
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A
female
reader, DenimandLace44 +, writes (25 September 2010):
 The reality is "the rest of your life" he will not be there. If you are 20, he is 57. But when you are 40, he will be 87... I appreciate the fact that you love him, but you two will never be on the same page. He is not "old enough to be your father." He is old enough to be your GRANDFATHER. (My mother was a grandmother at 35.) I just dont think it can work for long. However "young at heart" he is, and "mature" you are, you have more than a generation gap. You have two generations to bridge. Sometimes love just isnt enough. If you try to make it work, take each day as the gift it is. Treasure each moment. Love is a strange but "many spendored" thing.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2010): No, it's not ok. You are in for a lot of pain. He wants a caretaker and you will not feel the same about him when he is 85 years old when he really needs a caretaker. Even he doesn't expect this to last but he's having fun while it does. He's not thinking about you but himself. Your family will be devastated and rightfully so. don't ruin your life this way. You deserve so much more! Be kind to yourself and run.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2010): What do you care what other people think? You are happy right? He is happy right? So there you go. Do whatever you want, as long as you feel comfortable with it. It shouldn't matter what the outside world thinks when it's about you 2.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (25 September 2010):
 You are really the only person whose opinion matters on this subject. Are you comfortable with it? Nowadays, these types of relationships occur more and more. You are not alone and I don't think anyone really cares or should care as long as YOU are sure this is what you want.
I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, misLadYd..  +, writes (25 September 2010):
 honestly if you guys love each ada dat much.other ppl's opinion shouldnt matter and hey age is nothing whn it comes to love.so live yo life and enjoy yo relationshp with yo man.fgt bwt wat ppl myt say.gd lck
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (25 September 2010):
 My advice would be to any people that givee you a hard time to ignore them as they are not worth the time of day, it is your life and if you have found love with a guy that is 37 years older than you, then so what? As long as the both of you are happy then you arent hurting anyone and nobody has the right to interfere in your relationship, at least you have found love, good luck in the future :-)
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