A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok, so I have been dating my girlfriend for about 1 and a half years, and we have been through a lot together. I am a junior (almost senior) in college and she is working at her dad's bank as a teller, so she obviosly gets more money than I do (her dad is also the CEO). I do everything i can to contribute to the relationship, i sacrifice all that I can. The problem with our sex life is that she doesn't participate. She will hardly even acknowledge that i have a penis. I am definitely the kinky one in the relationship. She's given me a ------- once because she felt obligated to, since I asked her a few weeks before. I loved it, I even told her numerous times how much I loved it. She loves having sex but I am always the one to bring up sex and I am always the one to turn her on and seduce her. I am always thinking of new ideas and whatnot to maintain an exciting sex life.Why can't this be the other way around for a couple times? I almost feel like I am intimidating her. What can I do?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2007): Then try would she does! When you want to just tell her "I want sex" and see what happens!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2007): hmmm... talk to her about it. most girls like it when guys bring it up. because girls are more afraid to talk about it.
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A
male
reader, Samutsen  +, writes (18 December 2007):
 I cant see any problem there. I think she likes it when YOU want and initiate sex and get turned on with your desire and lust.
And the fact that she says I want sex and pronounces it makes even more sexy.
I see no problem here.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOne more thing...
Whenever she wants to have sex, she just tells me straight up that she wants to have sex, she doesn't send me any signs or anything that says "i want sex".
I feel like i'm being selfish, that is why i never say anything, but I have contributed so much for this relationship, not just sexually.
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A
female
reader, girlwhoneedshelp  +, writes (18 December 2007):
 Don't worry, you're not the only one. I used to feel like that about my boyfriend. I seem to have a much higher sex drive than him...or so I thought. The reason he never initiated sex was because he didn't want to force me to do it if I didn't want to but once I told him that I basically wouldn't mind having sex all the time whenever he wanted he definitely got the idea and started things by himself more often.
If your girlfriend has give you a ------- before she obviously isn't against it or disgusted by it so why doesn't she do it more often? Tell her that she isn't contributing enough to your love life and that its making you feel like she doesn't care. Make sure she understands that this is your special, loving time together and if she's not willing to be there for you as much as you are there for her then perhaps she's not as serious about you as you are about her.
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A
female
reader, Fairy_Lu +, writes (18 December 2007):
 Tell her how you feel she probably doesnt realise that its what you want from her dont forget she is probably tired and sometimes just wants to lay there, just be patient tell her what you want and need and take it slow give her time to get used to being in charge. Or just dont initiate sex let her come to you and see what happens
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A
female
reader, Candy*kissess* +, writes (18 December 2007):
 The best thing to do is to talk to her about it and how you feel.I know it's not right to ask your other soul mate for something too much. God, I had to ask my bay bay boy for some and it make me feel so uncomfortable when we are having sex b/c I had to basically bring it up and "ask" if we can do it.Give you girl a ton of excitement during sex so this way she can come back for more. That always help for me!Good luck sugCandy kisses*
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