A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am separated for two years now, husband gets copies of the keys to the house off my son's keys, they are the ones you leave in the door. My sons won't get involved and I understand but my ex just lets himself in and snoops, I am afraid of taking the legal way in case he flips.
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female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (14 November 2008):
 When you say 'flips', do you mean become violent? Won't he flip when he can't get in, too? That is a worrying word to me... I would make sure that you are as careful and protected as you possibly can be. I hope you've spoken with your solicitor and the police as well as your friends. And your sons have lost the right to have keys to your house. Stand up for your own safety if they are not going to help you.
Why not install an alarm system with motion detectors? That should stop him snooping. You might have a camera installed too, that show him entering without authorization. Then you could move toward legally barring him from being anywhere near you or your premises.
I just don't like how he's managed to terrorize you to the point you're afraid of seeking legal help. He's got you right where he wants you, scared. Not good. Get your power back.
Have a look at this website or call their number. It can't hurt and might actually give you some much needed assistance.
Womens Aid-The premier resource for domestic violence and sexual abuse against women and children in the UK. Got a massive range of support services from “safe refuges” for those most at risk to just plain old sound advice. Site is awesome but friendly and welcoming so not surprising some victims feel more reassured just visiting it.
www.womensaid.org.uk
0808 2000 247 (Freephone)
Good luck.
A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (14 November 2008):
 P.S. - The brand of locks that I had installed were Medeco, but their may be other brands. They are the type of security lock that office buildings and stores use.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (13 November 2008):
Your sons may say they don't want to be involved but since they keep letting their dad get hold of their keys, I think you could be right in getting the locks changed and not giving them a copy.
Or get an alarm fitted that silently alerts the police when there is an intruder.
I don't get why you are so scared of getting a restraining order.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums +, writes (13 November 2008):
There are locks that can't be copied without your OWN identification code, which you receive when you purchase the door lock. No one can get keys cut without your permission and the security identification number for your locks. Get a licensed and bonded locksmith to change all the locks in your house. He won't be able to pull this again, even if your son HAS a key, and he's a real S*&% for putting your son in the middle. I would ALSO document and journal all of the previous incidents and give them to your lawyer. Cheers.
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