A
female
age
30-35,
*unflowerpower
writes:Okay, so. About 2 weeks ago, I met this guy, we will just refer to him as "Alex". Alex is 30 years old, physically and intellectually my type, and we have great chemistry. When we first met, he said he was the type of person who needed to start relationships with sex first. His logic behind this is that it is a bad situation to be in when you really like someone, take it slow, and then the sex is bad. So I agreed to do things his way. We met, went out, had fun (meaning I sucked him off), and then the next week we did it again. He has been keeping in contact and is very sweet, and conciderate about things, but I worry that he is thinking of me a strictly a "friend with benefits", and not a potential relationship (which is how I see him). We haven't had actual intercourse yet, but I worry that if I do it with him, that will be the doom of things, and if I don't it will also be the end. What should I do? I really like Alex, and I feel like there is possibility for him and me. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2009): Honey, a 30 year old man is not interested in you for your brain. Get away quick before it will hurt even more.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2009): He's a 30 year old guy who can't get women his own age, and now he gets a teen girl to have sex with without having to pay her! Im guessing he's in 7th heaven and happy as can be.
Hun, this guy is using you for sex. It stinks of it a long way. No man with good intentions argues to have sex BEFORE getting emotionally involved in a relationship. He's just looking for sex thats all.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2009): He sounds quite disrespectful and a bit of a womaniser. If he really respected you he would take it slow and find out what the sex was like later on. You should talk to him about his feelings and then take it from there. I must admit, 16 and 30 is quite a gap- esp when you are still at school. Good Luck!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (16 October 2009):
Well, like I said. Don't let this guy use you. If he's truly interested, he'll wait until you're ready.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2009): What Vozik meant to say is that with that age difference, there it is almost ALWAYS considered statutory rape. Please don't let him use you.
If his logic were correct then why doesn't everyone just have sex on the first date? Because it's considered slutty, and gives you a reputation, and in many people's opinions it takes away a lot of the significance of being intimate with someone if you do it with every guy you ever go out on a date with. And I mean, sucking a guy off that you just MET two weeks ago? That's someone you just MET, not someone you've only been DATING two weeks. There's no actual relationship yet. Hmm...
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A
female
reader, sunflowerpower +, writes (16 October 2009):
sunflowerpower is verified as being by the original poster of the question 17. 18 in a few weeks.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (16 October 2009):
Don't let this older guy use you. If he's interested in more, then he will wait until you are ready. If he won't wait, then he's not good enough.
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