A
female
 ,
*achael123
writes:Hi ,my problem is that my long term partner and me are not getting on. he picks on the littlest things and brings me down on them.we have a 9 month old daughter and i am very much in love with my partner but even though i have tried to be the perfect little house wife ( i am only 19) nothing seems good enough. I feel very low and have no confidence left and have very low self asteem and only feel better when he praises me. please help me i really dont know what to do, i feel i am going insane. i have tried to talk to him but he somehow makes me believe it is all my own fault.
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female
reader, rachael123 +, writes (9 April 2007):
rachael123 is verified as being by the original poster of the question i left him yesterday and feel so sad it hurt so much. but i know i done the right thing. thanks you for your help.
A
female
reader, Sally R. Cinnamon +, writes (6 December 2006):
 Rachael,
I just want to back up what Irish has said. I think every word is true.
You are worth so much more than this man. There's a better future out there somewhere for you and your little one.
Sally
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A
female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (6 December 2006):
 try to get him to counseling or be selfish and dump him u only have to cope with your own life which is hard enpugh to bring up a bay at 19 and stuff u need help and love not peple bringing u down
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2006): Hun, I am trying to figure out how you can say you love a man who makes you feel like 'nothing' and brings you down? A true love grows out of respect, awe, admiration and trust and it's a love that lasts over the years. So you do need to stop using the word love as rationalization for tolerating what you shouldn't. Added to that, there is no love from him when he lacks respect and admiration for you. In order for a relationship to function in a healthy way, all these feelings of love...have to be mutual.
You are lonely, feeling lost and you are feeling trapped, thus experiencing a needy desperate attachment to a man who doesn't appreciate you. My suggestion is to think about going it on your own. Because once you do...your life begins. The good thing about doing this is you free yourself to doing something healthy. The sad thing is, it will hurt for awhile. How will you get through the pain and discomfort of this loss? You focus on all the wonderful, positive future possibilites that lay ahead for you and your daughter. If you do this and go, call in all the support and help from family and trusted friends. You need to build up your confidence in order to build strength and the only way you can do this is...getting away from him.
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