A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay so I am 17 and the guy that I like is 30 years old. I dont know what to do. He is the most amazing guy that I have ever met. Hes not immature like the boys my age. I know that there is a huge gap between our age difference but I think age is just a number when it comes to the matter of the heart. Am I wrong? It is so stressful having to hide our feelings for one another. How do I deal with this with my family and friends?? Please help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you both for taking time to answer my question. It helps a lot!
A
female
reader, superrrshawna +, writes (14 August 2008):
 i agree with mccool, even though i personally would never let any of my friends date a 30 year old, and we are a couple years older than you. i would set them up with every hot model guy friend in our age range i knew first!
13 years is a humongous age gap, and he has experienced things you will need to wait years to experience. he probably has his own place, own car, own job, when you are still living with your parents, probably just got your license, and you haven't graduated from high school, let alone college, let alone applied for a job!
if you started dating him, would his friends and your friends get along? would you be able to bring him to prom? what would happen for college? would he let you go out to parties, wait for you while you grew up?
follow your heart, but be very realistic when you take things into consideration, please!
good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2008): Why do you feel you have to hide your relationship? You give the impression that you yourself think it is wrong. If not, why hide it? You say he is not immature but are YOU mature enough to handle this, regarding the criticism you undoubtedly will get from close ones, and be able to judge his true motives?
Personally, I see nothing wrong with the age gap - I've certainly had some very 'gappy' relationships myself and there's not been a problem regarding age difference.
I say, go ahead with this, bring it out in the open, see if you can both take the flack and if it eventually falls apart, then that's just all part of lifes' experiences and you'll learn from it. But if this goes from strength to strength, then who cares what others think, so long as you are both genuinely happy? You just need to explain to close relatives that he makes you very happy. It's your life, not theirs and I wish you both well.
Good luck.
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