A
female
age
36-40,
*rama_diva
writes:I recently got engaged and since then I've had the unusual urge to cheat. I've always wanted to get married and nothing could be more exciting to me. But a growing desire for trying some let's just say wild things before I have a ring affixed to my finger has been growing?Is this normal?Is it that I'm unsure about my relationship?
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male
reader, eddie  +, writes (11 October 2007):
 Don't cheat. You name saysa a lot...drama diva. If it's such a strong thought, dot'nt get married.
A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (11 October 2007):
Everyone thinks about cheating. Mature people don't act on improper urges. I wouldn't take as a sign you are unsure about your relationship.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2007): You simply need to mature and develop yourself more, before getting engaged. When a woman is mature enough to marry a man she loves, she wants 'only' him, she is genuine, she is authentic and the 'real deal'. No other man can nor will turn her head. You are not there, yet, dear and I think it's good, you for wrote in to ask this question. Better to do that now than to wait until 'after' you are married and you have two squawling kids hanging onto your pantleg. Being genuine is being true to the commitments you have made to each other. Your temptation to cheat is a sign of immaturity. And that is not a bad thing, in this case. We have to remember you are just18-21.here. That is incredibly young to be engaged to be married. So your 'immaturity is normal and that means you are not ready. At least not now because your feelings are centered on your desire to feel wanted and important. You want to have some flings. This should be out of your system long before you get engaged. In time, as you develop and grow, you will shed all these little quirks, and you'll mature. It will be then that you will be able to focus on your bf and the deep bond you both share. Only then, will his attentions matter.
My advice to you, talk to your bf. Be honest and truthful. Tell him the engagement plans are on hold until you get to the 'place in life' that you have developed yourself enough to mature, grow and become the committed woman he needs, to move forward into marriage and family. That would be the most honest, most truthful thing you could do. It doesn't mean you break up...it just means you give each other...time to adjust and mature. But I will state, if you are seriously tempted to step out on him..then at least do the honorable thing and set him free first. Don't put him through the sorrow and pain of knowing you 'cheated' on him. Good luck in your big life decisions, dear.
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