A
female
age
26-29,
*ecca emma louise
writes:i have just started talking to the teacher who betrayed me a year ago after i found out i was pregnant and confided in her. i've never had the confidence to talk about what happened next even when i forgave her. i'll never forget what she did. We spoke about it the other night and she thinks i had an abortion! I didnt have the courage to set her straight. She doesnt judge me coz she told me to abort my child when i first discovered i was pregnant. She told me she thinks i did the right thing. But i acted as though i did have an abortion and now i feel really guilty. Its like an insult to the memory. Should i tell her the truth? Or should i just not mention it? or would it be best to just keep the story up? im so confused and wound up. help x
View related questions:
abortion, confidence Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, becca emma louise +, writes (21 December 2010):
becca emma louise is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni found out i was pregnant a year ago and confided in her, she told the deputy head of my school who told my mum. the teacher and my mum both wanted me to abort but i refused. i planned to keep the baby but had a miscarriage at nine weeks. i know its not her business and she doesnt need to know but i just felt guilty for not telling her what really happened. im glad i didnt listen to her though because i know i would have regretted it forever. i knew that no matter how hard it would have been i would have done my best and if it wasnt good enough then i would have considered adoption. im on good terms with this teacher now, we generally do not speak of the matter. i know she told a lot more people than she should and the matter was a lot more public than i ever realised but i try to forget that because i dont wanna fight with her again. thanks for the advice guys :)
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (10 December 2010):
 Did she tell your parents that you were pregnant, or report it to someone, is that how she betrayed you?
I think you don't need to pretend anything, whatever happened is now in the past. But I would also advise that maybe as you feel so strongly about this teacher that you just give it time and perhaps not talk to her now.
Generally speaking, the truth is easier to cope with than a web of lies or trying to hide something from people. Secrets have a way of getting out and it seems to me that much of the grief in the world is caused by not telling the truth.
Feeling guilt can be our subconscious telling us that we are doing the wrong thing.
Talk to your parents about this and maybe they'll have some good perspective for you. That's where I'd start, anyway.
Take care.
...............................
A
female
reader, chita22  +, writes (10 December 2010):
 Well I think its none of her business as long as your parents know what happened and your happy. I don't think she should have told u to abort what's it to her what if u grew up and regreted it. BTW what did u end up doing w/the baby???? Just tell her the truth its not like she's somebody your gonna have to face 4- ever!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2010): Well what really happened? Did you keep the baby? To be honest i would just leave things as they are with this teacher. It's non of her business and she let you down.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2010): I don't understand what happened here. You got pregnant. You told her. She betrayed you (somehow). And then what? Did you have an abortion? Have the child? Put it up for adoption? Tell people the truth, either way. Just don't wage a war with the teacher, you won't win. Distance yourself from her if you're not on good terms. If the betrayal was that she told your parents/ doctor/ etc., it's not a betrayal at all, law states she has to inform someone if she thinks you'll need help medically or emotionally and you're too young to be able to handle it by yourself, until you're legally an adult. Tell us more and we'll be able to help you more.
...............................
|
