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female
age
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anonymous
writes: I'm so sad, I don't know what to do. Me and my husband can't have sex , due to his lack of libido, and inability to get an erection . I just don't know what to do. I'm in such a despair , about this. Time to time, I feel I can't go on like this. I know , sex is not everything, but it is important. And if I see a healthy man, sometimes, I wish I could have real sex. So here is , what is very bad about this situation. My husband doesn't know, that why is he impotent. We had years of medical investigation, about this, sex therapists, medical test. But nobody could diagnose him. We gave up to look for answers, cause, there was none. And we had to give up. See Viagra can't help him, and many other things, cause he is not interested in sex. He can satisfy me orally, he is very good that way, but he feels nothing when he does that. And that turns me off very much. I wish if I could hear about others, who has the same problem,That they don't know the cause of his impotence. Also, can anybody understand how horrible is that, not even know it, and live with no sex.almost a decade, in a 30 year long marriage?Please tell me, what you think. Thanks
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erection, libido, not interested in sex, viagra Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2014): Yes it is very difficult not to know the cause. It would be easier to get a closure ,if there would be a definite cause, like heart problems, or medication issues. This way, it is a mysterious issue, with full of possibilities. Like is this relationship problem, or mental. Very sad, and hard to find a solution, what respects all aspects. Maybe , the answer is to find the right professional.
A
male
reader, barath  +, writes (20 July 2014):
dear poster so many coupes having this type of problems. but viagara is not a solution for this problem. first get good treatment from a good doctor that is better for you and your husband
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A
female
reader, mystiquek  +, writes (19 July 2014):
 If I am not mistaken you have posted on this subject numerous times. I'm not trying to be unkind, but the fact is that none of us here are doctors. With that being said...has your husband been to a psychologist? psychiatrist? And going out on a limb..has your husband ever been hypnotized?? Is is possible that something happened to him in his past that he has blocked out and that could be the problem?? Its just a shot in the dark..perhaps something that you might consider because nothing else has worked.
My ex husband had sexual problems the whole time we were married. I never could really understand what was wrong. One night while drunk he blurted out that he had been molested as a child by a family friend...that sort of explained alot. He refused to get help, but at least I could understand things better. He had never told anyone what had happened to him.
Eventually I divorced him. It wasn't the lack of sex, he became an alcoholic and I just couldn't stand being around him. Only you can decided what to do. Do you love him enough to stay knowing you'll never have sex again (I guess?) Do you want to ask him if you can have a lover? Or do you want to divorce him? Only you can answer these questions. What do you want really?
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (19 July 2014):
 It cuts both ways; 50 years married, wife can't/won't no sex in 15 years.....Life sucks, then you die. Hope your luck improves. I'm sure mine won't.
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A
female
reader, StephJayne  +, writes (19 July 2014):
 I know I've never been through anything like relationship. I am young, but, regarding him not actually wanting sex, possibly talk to him to find out why? Being together for such a long time and in the past 10 years he has no sex drive? Perhaps his condition has made him think that he will never have sex again? Talk to him, tell him it is important in the relationship to keep sexual activity up, but you will do anything to help him. You love him, it's not his fault he can't get an errection or perform sex, but there needs to be an answer as to why he doesn't want to. Why he doesn't get turned on or feel anything while he's performing oral sex.Hope everything turns out alright, take care
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