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How to beat competition for my crush?

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 March 2011) 2 Answers - (Newest, 23 March 2011)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Long story short, been speaking to this girl for about 2 months. I like her, I've felt at times she likes me just through little things she does and says. I feel I've played it a bit too cool though. I mean, I once gave her a hug and I've invited her out one or two times - as a social group thing - but she pulled out. I even offered to pay for her ticket for a gig she wanted to go to with me, but then she realised she had no money. I talk to her whenever I can in person but I've only commented on her Facebook once, and only texted her regarding social events.

Now, last week she added this guy from College she never spoke to previously. She posted on his wall, and they've been having long conversations with little flirty/banter-ish comments thrown in. He's always commenting on her posts. They spoke a lot at College last week, and when I was trying to talk to her he just couldn't shut up! It's like he's getting in my way. Just yesterday she left a message on his wall trying to initiate conversation, and today she asked him if he was coming to the canteen at College for lunch on Facebook. He said he wasn't in during the morning so she urged him to come along.

Any ideas how to win back her attention? I'm not looking for "just ask her out" or "just tell her how you feel" answers. I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. I just want to get her onside again before it's too late.

View related questions: crush, facebook, flirt, money, text

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A female reader, lillydream2 Australia +, writes (23 March 2011):

hmmmnnn, to tell her how you feel I think you need to just be yourself. If she doesn't see you for who you really are then she doesn't deserve you. The worst thing you can do is act too needy.

Just go straight up to her and tell her, she will be happy that you have confidence. Also, getting into a 'competition' for her love just isn't a turn on. if there are other guys that want to be with her, you need to step back and not compete because if you do, she will just see you as the same as the other guys trying to win her over.

:)

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (22 March 2011):

Unless you ask her out, you will be too late. You've lost he attention, and it won't come back at all unless you step up and get on with asking her out. You've already played it too cool and too slow, and she now is moving on.

Forget trying to get attention, it won't work. If you like this girl, go for broke because she won't be impressed if you try to get her attention and show nothing for it.

Get on and ask her out already, don't waste more time because if you do this other guy will get her and you'll be out permanently.

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