A
male
age
26-29,
*teelhawk65
writes:Hi, I've got a friend that I'd like to "come out" to. He's a really nice person and probably the best friend I've ever had. I trust him fully, but there's just one problem.I don't know what his opinion is on gay people, and I'm a bit parinoid about him reacting like.. "What the f*** you stupid queer I never want to see you again!!" That would kill me :(So, I'm going to invite him to hang out, and I was wondering how to "approach" him with this very touchy (for lack of a better term) subject. He's really the only decent friend I have, and I don't want to lose him by him finding out the wrong way.Any ideas on how to start the conversation? Thanks in advance!
View related questions:
best friend Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Steelhawk65 +, writes (7 January 2011):
Steelhawk65 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks everyone.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2011): easy :) just test the water first :) i had the same problem... except i was in love with him... but thats beside the point :P i was terrified of telling him... when i eventually told him he was like... yeh i know... someone told me and i'm not bothered by the fact you're gay... he continued to the "being in love with him" bit but that again is besides the point... so yeh :) now i'm out to everyone at school and i only hear the odd homophobic remark... but i just ignore them because it makes them lesser than me and i know i have hundreds of other people who will stand by me.If at the end of the day he is a homophobic loser then he's not worth keeping as a friend :)ps: to the guy with the knock-knock joke that is super cute and i shall add it to my list of possible ways to come out to my parents! :D
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): If he doesn't like gays, he can't be your friend. Simple.
And I came out with a knock knock joke on my birthday.
Knock knock
who's there
me, and I'm gay.
It works well!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2010): I know what you mean when you say "you don't want to lose him as a friend." Just tell him you need to talk and come out with it. My best friend told me she is bisexual and everything is okay. It shouldn't matter if you are gay, bisexual, lesbian No one can help who they like. I think he will still be your friend, if he is your friend at all everything will be alright.
...............................
A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (30 December 2010):
 Chances are he probably suspects something already. As much as you may try to hide it, it's not something that's easily hidden for most people.
As far as starting a conversation about it, it may just be best to ask. There's lots of stuff out there about gay marriage and the like. That would be a good topic to find out his feelings about homosexuality without coming out just yet. Or, the repeal of "don't ask don't tell" in the military. Current events are neutral and therefore safe to discuss openly. His reaction will likely give you a good picture of how he will respond if you tell him about yourself.
When you tell him about yourself, make sure he knows you're not hitting on him or expecting anything from him. He's just your friend and you wanted to confide in him. He may be a little uncomfortable, but if he is your most understanding friend, I doubt he'll be a jerk about it.
...............................
|
