A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:How many more nights am I going to have to go home alone?I've been out tonight and have had a very fun evening. But every time I go out and have fun, I always end up alone in the end. Tonight I ran into a girl who used to fancy me. We even kissed a little, but she ended up going off with some other guy tonight. I suppose it was just as well, because I'm not ALL THAT attracted to to her. But I've gone home tonight without anybody. It's been almost a year since I last had sex with someone and that's becoming really hard to accept. What can I do? I enjoyed tonight, but knowing that Sex wasn't part of it sort of spoiled it. What do you think? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Aylarsh  +, writes (25 February 2008):
 I understand what you are saying now. Could you probably be saying something or talking smart to any girls? The girl you kissed could maybe have hinted that she wanted just sex from you and she gave up and went with that guy.
Try thinking of other things besides this. If you aren't having a good time it's going to be shown on your face. If not through your body launguage. Maybe she wanted to get even with you for something? Be confident with yourself and emit good things and then you will attract people to you. Be up front and ask for that girls number and make sure that she knows you are interested in her as a person and someone that you can have comversation with.
If you need anymore help don't hesitate to ask me!
Good luck love 3!
A
female
reader, Tigerlily +, writes (23 February 2008):
Okay well when you say something like "I enjoyed tonight, but knowing that Sex wasn't part of it sort of spoiled it" that does come across the wrong way. If you are looking to have a girlfriend, someone in your life, it's a bit hard to give any advice as you don't give us any background or information on what might be the problem.
So in a total guess (because it's all I've got to work with) Do you need to work on your communication skills? You posted a question about your feelings here and were completely misunderstood. Is the same thing happening with you with girls? Perhaps you are giving them mixed signals or they think you are a closed book and then you get moody or upset and they don't know why. Don't dwell on being alone, that's kind of negative. Be open, smile, be confident, women respond really well to confidence and a sense of fun. Strike up a conversation and be sure that you let her know you like her, be sure you are asking for her number and say you would really like to take her out, instead of just hoping she'll offer it or something.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOh dear. You've all taken what I said the wrong way. My fault.
I didn't mean I wanted to come home with someone physically (I don't believe in one night stands). It was more that I wanted to have gotten a number, or, you know, arranged meeting up to see them again. Last night at that party, the girl who I got a bit of a kiss out of (who I went to school with) was said to have gone off with some guy she had just met, for sex... This is probably what made me start dwelling on how I was alone, where others had somebody. I hadn't thought about it all night. I was having a lovely time at the party, but then suddenly I'm reminded "People are meeting other people, they're having a great time, they're having sex... and you're not!"
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A
female
reader, sue88 +, writes (23 February 2008):
BE A BLOODY GENTLEMAN!
Sex sex sex, not meaning to be nasty here but it's men like you that gives them a bad name.
In my opinion any woman (or man) who decides to go off with someone and have sex without even knowing them has no self respect, anything to get a leg over is degrading yourself.
If you have tried that one going out getting drunk, do you not think its time to change your approach, try different places and you never know there may be a girl there you like that likes you, and instead of 1 nights sex maybe a lifetime of sex is in it for you.
Good Luck and life really isn't just sex so chill out, slow and steady wins the race lol
Sue
x
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A
female
reader, Tigerlily +, writes (23 February 2008):
Maybe you should try dating a girl properly instead of just randomly trying to hook up in a bar or at a party night after night. Ask a nice girl out. Take her to dinner. Bring her flowers. Don't try to sleep with her for a few weeks. There are lots of women who are very lonely for a good man, and love sex, but they aren't going to just go home with you the first night you meet.
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A
female
reader, Aylarsh +, writes (23 February 2008):
Well at least you got some kissing in. If you feel so strongly about getting some sex in then go find someone at a bar maybe and get some meaningless. The only good sex you will find is with somoene that you like and that likes you back. Just keep on being a gentlemen and all. You'll find someone you know.good luck love.
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