A
male
age
36-40,
*attty215
writes:hi everyone. i recently met a very lovely girl on an internet dating site, and at the weekend we are going on our 3rd date.i really like this girl and things seem to be going really well, which is odd as i normally dont ever get a 3rd date as im quite unlucky.my question is how many dates should it be before i ask her to be my girlfriend? and how would i go about doing it?the reason i ask since we met on a dating site, she will still be on it and id rather not loose her to someone else while i'm still making my mind up.is 3 dates too soon to ask her if she would like to be my girlfriend? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2012): Hey, dont rush. If she likes you then she wont lose interest. Just see her as often as you can, without becoming a stalker lol. Be romantic, do something conciderate like finding out her favourite sweets and getting her some. Talk about common interests and always tell her that you want to see her again at the end of each date, so she knows you like her and are interested, dont keep her waiting for days and days to answer txts ect as men seem to think that women like to be kept waiting, trust me we dont, it makes us unhappy.Things will progress on their own, and maybe after a couple of months if things r still unclear thats when you need start trying to establish where you stand not before or you may scare her off. Good luck xxx
A
female
reader, katiekate  +, writes (22 March 2012):
 I think three dates is too soon to really know each other well enough to label one another "boyfriend/girlfriend". You never know though...you always hear stories about how people meet and end up engaged within months (now, whether those relationships last or not, who knows...). Instead of asking her to be your girlfriend, how about just saying that you like her and that you're not interested in dating anyone else, and see how she responds. The difference is slight, but I do think that dating exclusively and being "boyfriend/girlfriend" are two different things.
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A
male
reader, Kyle007 +, writes (22 March 2012):
I've got it on the first one before, to be honest. As soon as you want an exclusive relationship, its best not to waste time saying it.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (22 March 2012):
I wouldn't worry about asking her to be your girlfriend yet. Just say you're really interested in her and would like to seem more of her. It's a bit too soon to say you want her as a girlfriend, and might be too soon to ask her to leave the dating site.
Instead, tell her you want to see more of her as you're hugely interested, and tell her that you're coming off the site (and actually do it). That way, she has more of an idea that you're interested, and maybe she will naturally follow suit.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (22 March 2012):
 You won't lose her if she is interested in you and you won't be able to keep her if she's not. Relax and enjoy your budding relationship. Don't rush things.
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A
male
reader, Htsn47 +, writes (22 March 2012):
 I think that depends a lot on the personalities of the people involved. I told my fiancée that I was not going on dates with anyone else after 3 or 4 dates, but we had been clear from the start that neither of us was interested in a casual relationship. So I knew that she was likely to be comfortable with that situation.
Rather than ask her to be exclusive, I put it the other way around: that I was going to stop dating other people and was taking down my online profile while I was seeing her.
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