A
female
age
36-40,
*ragic Rabbit
writes:Okay, so I have a question about Men and calling. First let me tell you the details: last weekend me and a bunch of coworkers all went out for drinks. During the night I stated talking to one of the guys (someone I had previously only known in passing) Turns out we have alot in common and the same sense of humor. We ended up sitting off by ourselves most of the night. We flirted and ended up kissing. He asked if I wanted to go back to his place and I said "No, but only because I am very drunk right now" he kind of chuckled and joked about me being a lightweight and we talked a bit more before I headed home in a cab.since then we talked a lil via Facebook chat and then at work over the next two days. It was just small talk but it was allot more than usual (considering 'usual' means a hello in passing if that). To tackle the elephant in the room I sent him a message on facebook, telling him I had a great time the other night and joking that I 'still owed him a drink' and asking if he was interested in going out sometime after work. I attached my number and said if he had a free night coming up soon he should let me know, and added a flirty remark about 'picking things up where we left off'.It's been 48 hours and I've heard nothing, no call no response on facebook ,even though I've seen him logged on. How long should I wait before writing him off?I know he's single, and actively looking for someone at the moment, I'm just worried he was just caught up in the moment and not actually attracted to me.
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at work, co-worker, drunk, facebook, flirt, kissing Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2012): Right him off now. Just assume he's not interested. If he is and contacts you then that's cool but assume it was just a drunken hook up, he did try and take you back to his afterall. His intentions that night at least were for a casual hook up. So just assume that's all it was because he didn't even ask you for your number that night and now you've handed yourself to him on a plate and he still hasn't responded.
I'd assume he's not going to respond rather than waste my time waiting. The ball is in his court, don't take anymore action.
A
male
reader, DunKair  +, writes (29 April 2012):
Seeing as he did talk to you for a while longer, he did show signs of being interested in you. It could be because he didn't want to seem desperate and wanted to wait a couple of days. Don't take it too hard, it could be a good thing. I think some men take longer to respond if the girl is very good looking because they don't want to sound desperate.
It could also mean that he saw you as someone he wanted just for a night, not for a relationship. He did say he wanted to bring you to his place, so that isn't out of the question.
No matter what, don't over think it. Maybe he was busy for the past 2 days and just didnt get a chance to check facebook. Maybe the number you gave him was wrong? It could be many possibilities so just live life.
If he calls, great. If he doesn't, oh well there are plenty of other people.
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A
female
reader, Latti +, writes (29 April 2012):
Okay....you've made it clear that your interested in hanging out AND the next move is on him. Some men are straight forward AND will call the next day AND some don't like to look to anxious AND wait a while. I would say don't stress over it....at all. If he calls...fine....if he doesn't...thanks for not wasting my time. When you see him in passing, I would never bring it up or ask how come you never called me. Obviously, he's not as interested in you sober as he was when you were drunk or he may actually be busy. Either way, if you don't wait, you don't waste any time.
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