A
female
age
41-50,
*s5900
writes:My boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me 5 days ago. I am trying the no contact theory. How long should I wait to contact him. I really miss him and wish he would come back. Please help.
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male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (22 December 2009):
 This is simple. Simply call him when you fell comfortable to that's it. That's all that matters at this point. :)
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2009): Wow such different advise here.My opinion is the ball is in his court any more calling on your part is desperation.He has to miss you in order to build back the attraction until that happens you will be pushing him away.He knows you love him and are willing to try, leave it at that.
The point is to figure out why the conflict for breakup.not whether to call or not.
The reason for the break up is either fixable or not, plain and simple.
Guys are not that complicated.
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A
female
reader, lovelife1437 +, writes (19 December 2009):
If you feel that you will be "crushed", then call him by Christmas to say Happy Holiday and talk casually as friends. Don't start with the 21 questions, like "do you miss me, etc." Just see how he's doing and what he's been up to and get a feel to see if there's still chemistry between you two. Also, if you talk to him, you'll feel easier to take things slow but if he's rude and etc. then you know you deserve to be a better relationship. :-)
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A
female
reader, ts5900 +, writes (18 December 2009):
ts5900 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your advice! I really appreciate it. So...if I was to make contact first, how long do you think I should wait before I contact him. It has been 5 days since I spoke to him last. Our last meeting, I told him all that I had reflected on and realized about our relationship issues. He cried when I told him all of this. Then when he left my house, he told me that 'he would be in contact.' This is why I am so hesitant to call him. Do you still think I should call. And if so, how long should I wait before I do so. I would be crushed if I dont have contact with him on Christmas. Does he still care if he hasnt called me? Or am I setting myself up for more heartache by thinking he will come back?
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (18 December 2009):
 dont call forget him he broke up with you move on theres other guys and you have a life to live
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2009): Dont call. If he wants you back he will contact you. If you call - he ignores your call or says its over, you are going to feel a lot worst. I am a strong believer of the fact that the one that does the breaking up needs to rescue the relationship. Its not about pride but I have learnt that when you end up calling, instead of feeling better you feel a lot worst if you dont get the response you were hoping for. In the mean time - let it go and start living.
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A
female
reader, lovelife1437 +, writes (18 December 2009):
If he broke up with you then give him all the time he needs to be away. Maybe it's not meant to be. If you really miss him then give yourself some time to make sure that you truly miss him and not because you've been used to having him by your side for the 2 years. If later you still truly miss him, then call him to see if you two can give it another chance. If he refuses, then it's time for you to move on as well. If you're meant to be, you'll end up together again without having to force the relationship. It's not worth it to be in relationship with someone who isn't 100%. Good Luck! :-)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2009): Unless you did something really bad more likely he found someone that he thinks is hotter.The problem is you can't wait around at all.Do the things you like to do before you met him.Get busy and the time will fly.When you become unavailable your value goes up.It will hurt at first but we all have gone through it.At least he was decent enough to end it clean not leaving you hanging to false hope.
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A
female
reader, anonymous011 +, writes (18 December 2009):
 i think you should call him and tell him how you are feeling because your just putting yourself thru pain
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A
male
reader, Griffo +, writes (18 December 2009):
It dosent work it will send the wrong signals to a guy and it will all fall apart. It creates false hope/expectations and before you know it your back where you left off.
Playing mind games will get you nowhere. Just call him now and be honest. If that dosent work just move on because you'll be able to walk away saying "at least you tried" therfore you'll have no regrets!
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