A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:How do you let go of your 1st love?I can't seem to fully do it. I love my boyfriend now, and i want to be with him always, but i can't let go of the past. My first love was my best friend, and i find it hard that he's going to a different college and even though we don't speak much anymore i'm going to miss seeing him around so much. I told him i'll miss him, and that i'll never forget him because now i know it's the end of what we had and it's as though the book has finally closed after many years. He kissed me and said he know's how i feel. I feel bad for doing that behind my boyfriends back but i needed to, just one last time.I just can't seem to let go of my ex though. Even though i love my boyfriend with all of my heart.Any ideas?
View related questions:
best friend, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Flash71  +, writes (15 June 2009):
I know everyone is different but I don't know how you love someone with all your heart be in love with someone else. I know I would be devastated if my partner was still in love with their ex while they were with me (if I was serious about them anyway). I disagree with the keeping in touch part if you are pursuing a new relationship. If you want to move on you have to leave the ex behind. It may take time but I think you need to have purged yourself of feelings for him before any new relationship can stand a chance. It has to be able to be done because not many people marry their first love and you would think that stronger feelings than "first love" (usually experienced in teenage years when hormones are going mental) are involved when making this decision.
A
male
reader, sean sean +, writes (13 June 2009):
one day you're going to get lonely and say to your self dam ! whhrerre is my first lover friend ! trust me '! you will ! try to keep
in touch ! they don't make cell phones and pencil and paper for nuthing
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2009): i dont think anyone has an answer to this question including myself.. my situation is no diferent to yours only i didnt go out with my first love but my emotions was so strong that i still can feel the pain to this day 3years later.
i have a boyfriend that i love but not in love with and i too myself find it very hard to let go off the past specially that i have to face seen him and his girlfriend together every so often.
i think the best thing to do is learn to live with it, remember your first love will always be different to other boyfriends you have in your life just try not to compare them.
it might also help if you dont contact him at all as you dont want to refresh your memories with him.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2009): I'm only 15 i'll be thrilled when I can answer this question for myself. I know I'm just a baby in the world of dating, but I fell in love with my best friend and he was only the 4th boyfriend I ever had. I know it was love, because right now I'm at a high-school-infatuation stage with my new boyfriend. I don't feel like I'll ever be over that first love. I think I probably will... (right?) And I was lucky to have loved, but it hurts, even now that I'm happy.
All the advice I really have to offer is that if you're happy, you're happy and don't let it pass you by. But when you're sad, embrace that too and don't deny yourself your emotions.
Good luck!
-GG
...............................
A
female
reader, imcurioustoo +, writes (13 June 2009):
Hey im only 17 but I know what your going through.. There was a guy I was dating lets just call him chuck.. And chuck and I dated on and off for about 2 years not only was he my boyfriend but he was my best friend too.. He cheated on me a lot and I guess id always kid myself saying oh he'll change but he never did .. He ended up dating some girl while he was still with me and I found out .. Then she dumped him for another guy then chuck took her back from him and about 3 months later I ended up with the guy that chucks mistress was with .. Crazy right .. But matt and I have been together ever since its been a year and 2 months on the 25th and I love him more than anything else.. Its a matter of telling yourself you'll get through it and that there's someone else out there for you.. Love yourself first that's the most important thing
...............................
|
