A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:HiHow do I write good text messages and avoid texting too much?I met a really nice french girl, beautiful, smart and very sincere. I asked her out and she agreed, but later she texted me saying she can't make it but definitely another day. This is where I made the first mistake. I know I should wait a few days but I wrote the next day. I got a reply the first time when I wrote about something stupid about college stuff that was unecessary. I was trying to converse via text and it was stupid. I told myself not to text but after a day i just spontaneously text and kick myself afterwards. Its not anything crazy but like "hey do you want to catchup later" or something but no reply. I should just have the discipline to stop.I met her at Uni on the third day. She still seemed happy to see me and we talked a bit but I didnt have the chance to talk to her alone. I made the mistake of not walking with her home. Then I made the mistake of writing another message about not being making it to a party and meeting up later for drink and I never heard from her. I think she misunderstood this text. She avoided me when I met her at a pub last friday (a week ago). I wrote to her two more times but havent heard back.I am not a desperate guy. In fact I am very good looking and there are more than a few girls that are interested in me but this was the girl I am interested in. I just wanted to meet her and get to know her but I messed things up.I have deleted her number and messages and history so I don't stick my foot in my mouth any further. If I meet her and get a chance to talk I'll try otherwise its better this way. Texting seems so limited and easily misunderstood. I don't think she will ever speak to me. Its the beginning of the semester and she will be here for 6 months. I wish there was a way but I think I have blown it. Even if I never meet her again I just don't want to keep making this same mistake. From now on, I am thinking of not writing anything more than 5 words and I hate to say .. always apply the 3 day rule. I was also thinking of not keeping the girl's number on my phone until I actually meet her. What do you think?
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female
reader, cute angel +, writes (6 August 2012):
 Good *chin up*..
Don't waste your time over one girl who couldn't even come to you and ask you for an explanation,that shows she just dint care enough,while you are here thinking about each and every word you said..instead find someone who aprreciates your effort most importantly who aprreciate 'you'..
Have a nice day
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMy response might have seemed that way but actually I am moving on. Your comments are useful. Hesitation is a real killer :-/. My problem is I am impulsive with texting but thats how I am sometimes. Explaining the text would be a long story but the point was I wrote too much instead of keeping it simple. As you said I am just over doing it.. I am going to keep things real simple from now on. Thanks again.
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A
female
reader, cute angel +, writes (5 August 2012):
I think your obsessing way too much about this girl,plus your overthinking as well..its like you worried about each move you make,and if this is how its goin to start then its going to hard once you become friends..you haven't been really care as to what you said in the text that she took offence!!..
Instead of wasting time thinking over and over again about something your not even sure is going to happen..
If you meet her like I said just take it in a smooth way and don't hesitate!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your answers. It helps a lot. I don't really have anyone I can talk to as I have been traveling all my life. Finally I am a little settled and have some good friends but this is not something I can share with them. Please post your thoughts.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the reply.
Cute Angel: Thanks but i don't think i'll have the chance.
Its not so simple. I can't tell unless I get a chance to talk to her and if she doesnt pickup I can't keep calling her. Girls keep their phones in their bags so they often dont pickup but if they see 5 missed calls.. then you become a freak.
The games people play seem unavoidable. Its unfortunate but until we get to know someone we really don't know and just one wrong word makes u look desperate or like a creep. I wish it was not this way. I am really sad about this girl. I know it will pass but things could have been different.. all because of one careless word I texted. She is really gentle and thats what makes my over texting even worse. She probably thinks I am a freak. I probably won't have a chance to explain myself. I know she lives a block or two from me. Now I hope I won't bump into her on the street because then she might think I am stalking her :( .. From my experience, keep texts short and simple!!! you can't take it back.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (4 August 2012):
 I think you're doing just the right thing....
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A
female
reader, cute angel +, writes (4 August 2012):
I don't really understand the games people play,you like someone' tell her',you want to text someone 'text',you want to call someone 'call'..all the 3 day wait rule doesn't apply..yess u need to do it smoothly and not in a stalkerish way that would creep the other person out and not over do it as well..When she texted you saying she cldnt make it,you shld have said 'hey that's ok,I was looking forward to seeing you tho,may be next time:)'..as simple as that..Don't over do the texting!!Now when you see her,just tell her 'hey my msgs may not have come thru as I wanted it to,don't take it in a wrong way..may be I could make up for this over coffee'?..LET her decide now if she wants to go out with you or not if she doesn't don't run after her!u would just be wasting time ..Good luck x
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