A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Ok, I'm sooo confused about the signals I'm getting from this guy that I have a crush on. So I could use any advice at this point. In one of my college classes I noticed a really cute guy about a month ago. We would glance at each other during class and he would look at me at the end of class as well. My friend convinced me that we should try to sit near where he usually sat. So we started sitting over there. For a few days he sat behind me. But then he started sitting next to me. And he always sits next to me, unless he comes in late and the seat is taken. We've never really talked at all, except for the one time he asked me about something he missed (since he came in late). Does all this stuff mean that he might be interested in me?? I'm also not sure on how I should talk to him. I really want to say something, but I get really nervous and shy. So I guess what I need advice on is (1) is he interested in me? and (2) how should I talk to him?Thanks a bunch for any help!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2007): 1. he is interested in you if he usually sits near you and looks at you
2. let's say you have a hard quiz coming up, so ask him if he is interested in studying with you and if he says yes, start the best conversation you can.
there you go!!!
A
male
reader, Lord of Skimmed Cheese +, writes (13 November 2005):
Of course he's interested! Can't you see he's obviously desperate to be around you! All you have to do is find a common interest. Maybe even just chat about the subject you're taking. Just follow him after class and discuss the lecture you just had. Fro there, you can just talk about anything. If he's interested and it looks as though he is, he'll want to talk. Just get to know each other. When you think yuor ready, ask him to join you for a coffee or brunch or something. From there on, it should be easy sailing. Once you get talking, he might even ask you out! Good luck!
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A
female
reader, missbunbury  +, writes (11 November 2005):
 It sounds like he might well be interested, but you're never going to know unless you get chatting! I know what you mean about how hard that is though. I'm very shy myself, but when I was at college I came up with a great plan for disguising my shyness a bit so that I could get talking to men. It takes a bit of bravery, but it's worked for me loads of times!
Basically, the situation was that I wanted to be able to talk to this guy, but I knew I would be really embarrassed to do so. So, I decided to work WITH my shyness rather than against it. I waited until we were in a seminar sat next to each other, and then I took a deep breath (surreptitiously) and 'accidentally' spilled a can of Coke down my front and all over my lap. Obviously, this got the guy's attention, he jumped up to help me rescue my notes and by the time I'd wiped up the mess, we were talking. Of course, I was bright red with embarrassment, but brilliantly enough he thought it was just because I felt silly about the spillage! And because I'd managed to pour the Coke on his notes too, I was able to offer to buy him a coffee to apologise, AND to ask for his number so that I could offer to find someone else we could get the notes copied from.
I know this all sounds a bit over-the-top, but it's a harmless enough little ploy and it worked for me!
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A
male
reader, jon153 +, writes (11 November 2005):
I know exactly how you feel!
I guess that in the position you're in, things that happen don't seem so obvious - but it seems to me that yes, he's DEFINITLEY taken an interest in you.
My advice would be to maybe start with little things; when he sits down next to you, or you sit down next to him, do you say 'hi' to eachother? And have you said anything else? If not, then maybe you should!
Gradually build up the conversation. Ask him for help with some of your work perhaps? Let him borrow a pencil?
Smile at him when you see him out of school and maybe say hi there. Talk a little more each day and I'm sure it'll come to something. :)
Good luck!
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, Jimmy +, writes (11 November 2005):
It seems to me that the guy is just as nervous as you, which means that he more-than-likely feels the same way. I, myself am an extremely shy individual and have had the same problems throughout my life, more often than not missing out and feeling hurt as a result. If you like this guy, try getting to know him. Start off by asking him a course related question and watch his reaction. Look him in the eye when you speak. If he blushes a little and his eyes dart around the room, it's a sure sign that he feels the same way but is nervous about asking you out. Many people misread this kind of reaction and think it means that a potential partner is not interested, but this is wrong. Start off gently and perhaps he will relax a little. Laughter is very important. If you get to know him well enough, maybe you should ask him if he'd like a drink at the college bar sometime, and take things from there. Hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2005): Why don't you ask him if he would like to get together with you and go over your class notes before the next exam? If you don't talk to him, and he doesn't know you are interested, how are you ever going to know anything about each other. Taking your girlfriend with you to class, and sitting with her is usually a clue that men take as meaning don't bother me. Unless he knows someone who will take her out, he is at a loss at how to separate you from her even if he wants to ask you out. Give him a break. Invite him to a one on one study date, and let it begin there. Leave your girlfriend home.
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