A
female
age
30-35,
*michelle
writes:I started seeing this guy for a couple of months. It turned into a him calling me late at night to come over (ending up having sex every time). I didn't want that kind of relationship but i did so bc i liked him a lot.I tried to talk to him about it, he would always say he needs time. BS. So it ended somehow.He doesn't talk to me anymore, but he txt me a couple of times to come over. We did it again. And he wouldn't talk to me again untill he needed some.I felt used but now I'm over it and not gonna let him use me again, although I still like him but time will heal it.Here goes the question. I know he will text me sometime again at night to come over.Should I just not respond? I want him to feel confused and mad! And sometimes when you dont reply, the person tends to want you more.Or should I just say 'listen, dont expect me to have sex w/ you, and then you dont talk to me again until you want some. Im not your b***h!' or how else should I say this?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2009): Run, don't walk, from this. It will destroy your soul and
your heart. I know, I have been there.
A
male
reader, Nic390 +, writes (18 October 2009):
 One thing you could do is give him a taste then just leave him when he wants you. lol. Or just tell him hes a dick. You should not like someone who treats you like a booty call.
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A
female
reader, mmichelle +, writes (17 October 2009):
mmichelle is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everyone for your answers! I think i'm just gonna ignore him and not reply. Don't wanna waste my time trying to explain to him, he knows what's up. I appreciate all the answers, it helped me a lot!
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A
female
reader, roxyrex  +, writes (17 October 2009):
 Well if u luv him and luv sex go with it but be warned any wrong moves withs guy u have 2 run
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2009): If/when he sends another text, just respond that you are not going to let him use you for sex and that you do not want to hear from him again, ever, under any circumstances. The only problem is that after you stopped talking and it "ended somehow" you had sex with him again. Which means he has the idea he can call on you any time he's got the urge.That's why you need to make it crystal clear that nothing is doing.
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A
male
reader, LessonsLearned +, writes (17 October 2009):
Good for you! Don't let your heart blind you from spotting a user. Here's my coup-de-text for this guy. "Im sorry I let you use me, but now I know better to avoid guys like you, goodbye" And then never respond to him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2009): Firstly, mad props to you for putting a stop to it. It seems like you've sorted your problem already. You decided you weren't happy with the situation and stopped it.If I were you I would simply ignore him completely now. Not because that will make him want you more, but because that's the quickest way to being completely rid of him. I don't know if you're saying you'd like to carry on seeing him, you just don't want to be used like that, or you don't want to see him at all. Personally, I don't think it sounds like you can have the sort of relationship you want with this guy, given the way he's treated you thus far. If I were you I'd just shut him out of my life and move on.I wish you well.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2009): How do you tell him to stop using you for sex?
You stop responding to his texts and late night calls for sex. In fact you don't see him at all.
In short, stop letting him use you for sex. Who cares how he feels if you stop answering his texts, etc?
Isn't it more important how he makes you feel?
The guy does not respect you AT ALL.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2009): When he next texts you reply that your not available in the evening, but youd like to hang out for lunch or something. Dont sleep with him.
If he doesnt respond or is rude then he doesnt respect you and never will. So forget him and ask him not to call again
If he does have a normal date, get to know each other and let it develope, put off having sex for bout 3 weeks or 10 dates whichever comes first. Then you will know if theres something there or not
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2009): I'm sorry to say this, but you didn't want that kind of relationship, and that's exactly what he got. If you continue to be in contact with him, that's the relationship you'll get.
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