A
female
age
41-50,
*anicalifornia
writes:How do I tell a guy that I like as a friend, that I'm not interested in him as a boyfriend?I met a guy on holiday as part of a big group of friends. I've since seen him again with several other people we met on holiday too, and we get on really well. The problem is, he's told other people that he'd like to go out with me, and I only like him as a friend.He's asked me to go to a movie with him tomorrow, I've said yes, but I don't want it to turn into a date! How do I tell him I'm not interested without ruining any chances of a friendship we might have at the moment?Any help would be GREATLY appreciated. Thank you.
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female
reader, 88jane +, writes (31 August 2007):
 The other posts have said it really!! you just need to be honest!! its best to be honest right from the start so that you dont unintentionally lead him on!
i think like true knowledge said, after youve gone to the cinema say somehing like "i had a great time, your a proper good mate, we should hang out again sometime!" if he doesnt get the hint this way then i think you have to put it more bluntly and say that you really like him but you just want to be friends! just let him down gently!! you can still be friends and hang out!!
just be honest!!
good luck hunny!!
xxxx
A
female
reader, penta  +, writes (31 August 2007):
 The kindest thing you can do is to let him know immediately that you don't want this outing to be a date. If I were a guy and a girl accepted my invitation to the movies, I would assume it was a date.
I would call him (before the date) and say something like, "I really enjoy your company, which is why I said yes to the invitation, but I've been thinking and I want to make sure that this isn't a date. I like you just as a friend and don't want to mess that up. Do you still want to go?"
There are three possibilities from there.
(1) he'll understand and still want to go
(2) he'll say "yes" automatically because he's embarrassed but still really wants it to be a date (watch for this, because it could get really uncomfortable)
(3) he'll say no, he doesn't want to go (at which point he may avoid you, but you have to give him his space)
Don't let him think there's hope when there isn't any. The sooner he gets over you the sooner he can go after someone available to him. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2007): Every single decision has consequences. If he is getting along with you then the problem is you give him chance to do it.Stop giving chances, just stay away from him. Eventually he will notice it.
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (31 August 2007):
 All you can do is be honest and up front with him about how you feel. Tell him you only see him as a friend and that is as far as this can ever go.
Make sure you tell him soon so that he knows where he stands and is not lead on in any way. if you leave it it will get harder to do, so the best time would probably be when you meet him for the movie tommorow night. It will be a weight from your shoulders as you know you would have done the right thing, and hopefully you can both be friends.
All the best x
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A
male
reader, True Knowledge +, writes (31 August 2007):
HI , honestly is most definately the policy in this case. Just tell him the situation straight away, maybe something like ' hi, thanks for inviting me to the cinema, i really like you as a friend, and i hope that we can do stuff like this again' give that a shot.
good luck
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