A
female
age
30-35,
*nderdog
writes:My grandparents sold their house at the start of the year. From the money they got from it, they gave they're grandchildren some of it. I got around £1500. At the time I was in a job that paid horrible money, less than minimum wage. The plan was to put the money my grandparents have to my savings and spend it on my holiday this year. Something went wrong with my bank and I couldn't transfer my money into my savings so for a few months the money stayed in my current account. During those few months I left my badly paid job anf was unemployed for a couple of months.Then when I went to transfer the money into my savings once my bank was sorted out, the money was gone. I'm not great at keep track of my money and I pay most things by card so I unintentionally (as in I never intended to spend it at all) I spent the money my grandparents gave me in pointless things. I feel horrible and completely regret it and now I'm obviously paying the price as in struggling to come up with spending money for my trip.A regret it completely and feel like such an idiot for not keeping better track of my finances. I know everyone makes mistakes but thags who I am. I the person that constantly does things wrong/stupid things. How do I stop beating myself up?
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female
reader, underdog +, writes (27 October 2014):
underdog is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the replies (sorry it's taken so long to get back to you all). I got myself a whiteboard where i now writen down all my bills I need to pay and how much I'm going to save each month now that I have a job. That's money that I can't and wont spend some i can save and not get into debt!
I'm trying my best to budget and look at this as a life lesson!
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (19 October 2014):
 Well if you already spend the money, there is only 2 options left.
KEEP beating yourself up... OR
LEARN from this mistake. LEARN to budget, LEARN to NOT use credit cards unless you can afford what you are buying and you really NEED to "stuff".
And remember beating yourself up won't bring the money back, so .. in essence, it's pointless to keep beating yourself up.
Some people can't handle using cards, it's too tempting, so maybe.. for a while don't bring it with you, just a few "Pounds" for daily stuff.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2014): I lot of people use You Need A Budget - YNAB.
It helps you budget and look ahead for longer time items, and set money aside.
Its a small PC program - but also have lots of videos on the ethos it tries to teach. Worth a look up, seems there are countless people who have turned their finances around thanks to it.
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A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (19 October 2014):
Hey, Nora, why don't you tell us what you REALLY mean? :-)
Op, don't beat yourself up. That isn't hardly anything in the grand scheme of things, and we've all made mistakes when we're young.
Maybe you could benefit from a money management class?
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A
male
reader, Mark1978 +, writes (19 October 2014):
 Nora B has some kind words of wisdom for you. Your grandparents have, indirectly, taught you the value of money. Put this behind you BUT learn form it.
If you are always disorganised and doing silly or wrong things then NOW is the time to tackle that. Your an adult now with adult responsibilities and an adult life to lead. In order to do that you need to learn self control, discipline and an ability to make mature decisions. Whether that be sexually, financially, with friend, family or partners, you must learnt to avoid making silly mistakes or not being in control.
Why not sort your money out with the bank so you can do internet banking so you can keep track of what is where. Don't just spend on a card without knowing what you can afford. Write down your financial priorities, plan your spending and stick to it.
You cant have your cake and eat it: a holiday is fine if you can afford it, if you are out of work or in a very badly paid job and you are given £1500 it would be unwise to spend all or most of that ON TOP of your own savings on a holiday. Your only young once I know but these are tough economic times and finding a job and money after your trip may be very difficult.
Mark
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A
female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (19 October 2014):
That was a nice gift of money and a pity the way it went.However this is the BEST AND MOST EXPENSIVE LESSON U WILL HAVE OVER MONEY.Learn from it and Never let anything like this happen again,that way you can stop beating yourself up It was an expensive lesson and one you wont forget for life.Would you consider paying for items by cash that way you might be better able to keep a check on the cash you have left and also you will not be paying the interest on the card.Be gentle with yourself and move on from this. Kind wishes NORA B.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2014): It's just money, doll, we all do it, hell, I did it last year at uni. You get given all this money and think you're fine and the next thing it's gone. Stop stressing yourself out because you'll only end up doing it again without thinking. Just wipe it out of your mind and start again. The fact of the matter is, if you didn't get given that money, you'd have never had it in the first place so look at it as money you never had. Just start saving your money again, but don't save all of your money, you need to spend every now and then. And don't use your card! That is the biggest mistake someone can make, especially if you're not good with money already. Set yourself a limit and when you get paid, draw the money out of your bank so it's in your hand as cash. Once that money is gone, it's gone and you wait until next month for more money.
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