A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I'm 14 years old, and i have absolutely no idea what i am here for. We're born, we live, we die. But what about after? I don't wont to be a speck of dust in the world. I want a legacy, a reason. Life seems so pre-made. It's tailored. I will go to uni, do OK. I will aim high in life, lose out but gain a job were I'll be OK. I'll be happy, but unsatisfied. I'll meet someone, maybe. Have a couple of kids and retire. I know. But that's the thing, I DONT wont to be a speck of dust and I DONT want my life to be uneventful. But i guess that's just the way it is, things happen only if you make them happen, but in my case i feel as though i will try, i truly will, but in the end i may as well pack it in and give up. Because life is so friggin predictable, and when something surprises you, it's always negative. I don't wont to be dust. I want to be different. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, shawncaff  +, writes (20 March 2011):
 You know, I remember thinking this very same thing when I was your age. It's an important question and it is good you are thinking about this now. And you are right in not wanting your life to be boring and predictable, and for you to be significant in the world. My answer to you would be, first, your life is going to be only as predictable as much as you allow it to be. As you grow up, you are going to face constant and increasing pressures: social, financial, sexual, etc. Some of these pressures are going to go against what you really feel and believe as a person. If you succumb to them when your conscience or inner feelings tell you otherwise, then it is then you will lose a part of your uniqueness. See, we humans want two opposite things: we want to feel special, but we are also afraid of not fitting in. We want to be unique, and feel our lives have meaning, but we also don't want to be alone. It is the clash of these two things that we struggle with all of our lives. But a life of significance means never forgetting your conscience in the face of comfort or the desire to fit in.All of us are forced to make compromises. And no one can stand alone, apart from society. It is only the callow young person (and I do NOT mean you) who thinks he can rail against humanity's evils and prejudices and remained untainted. But we all have weaknesses and we all yearn for companionship and thus we all make compromises.What IS in your control, however, is what society you want to live in, and what compromises you want to make. Your significance will always depend upon your continual ability to choose and make decisions. So it may all seem plotted out to you now, but if you look to the details, it is far from plotted out. You have a lot of choices you will be making: where you want to live, what contribution you want to make to the world, where you will be most needed, who will be your partner, who will be your friends? The main thing is to never forget you are significant. The way to do this is to always look for opportunities to be significant. The great thing about life is that you do not have to wait to grow up to start. You can do this TODAY. Look around you: how can you be significant at this moment? Can you say a kind word to a family member to cheer them up? Can you call a friend? Can you do a chore instead of watching television? Can you learn something you did not know before?And here is another truth: The more significant things you do, the more you will do. You will gain confidence in being significant and thus feel like you can do even more significant things. The converse is also true: the fewer significant things you do (i.e., the more lazy or selfish things you do), the more you will be accustomed to that and begin to feel like you don't matter. Being significant is not a right; we all have to work for and earn significance.So if you don't want to be a speck of dust in the universe, you don't have to be. The choice is yours. And it begins now.P.S. I highly recommend a book called Man's Search for Meaning by Victor Frankl, which I wish I had read when I was your age. It's a true story about a man who found significance in a Nazi concentration camp during World War II, even as he was treated worse than an animal. It's really worth reading.
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female
reader, live2loveandlearn +, writes (20 March 2011):
You are way too young to be worrying about such things in life, but then again I went through this very phase myself around your age and even re-enter it from time to time. No one wants to be 'dust in the wind'. Life does seem pre-planned, especially since we tend to work to make it that way. We prepare for college, prepare for work, prepare for marriage and children (as well as we can), prepare for everything. In order to be sure of safety and stability, these sorts of things are needed and to some extent even inevitable.However, you are YOU regardless of all these things. You walk your own path with it's own crazy twists and turns. And it is up to you to find for yourself what brings you happiness and the sense of wonder in life. I'm sure you've heard the saying "Life isn't measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away." It is true, I assure you!You are young, you are healthy, and you are capable of anything you set your mind to. Think to yourself, what do you really want? Is it to travel and see the world? To learn a new instrument or hobby? To experience nature at its finest? Do these things - you are never too old or too young to start! If you work toward these goals, they will come to be and you will have experiences that take your breath away and memories to last a lifetime. Be open to new things, new experiences, new ideas. Life is too short for us to be dust in the wind. The only ones who make life really worth living are ourselves and those we love and care for. And when you are feeling doubtful of what there is in the world that is worthwhile, go out to a meadow or quiet park at night and away from the busy city, lie on the grass and feel the earth beneath you, feel the wind around you, and gaze at the stars. Feel the power of the earth and how much there is unknown out there beyond and imagine....imagine holding it, grasping it, and make it your inspiration for life. There is so much in the world to see, to discover, to experience - you just have to go get it!
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reader, sebaslookingforward  +, writes (20 March 2011):
Life is much more than that. You are too young to understand. Childhood is just a grain of sand compared to your teenage years and adulthood. You are still too young, the point is not to be famous or be remembered by humanity because of something you invented or did, there's something deeper to it: many people do love you and will love you when you meet them and will always remember about you. Trust me. I would explain in further detail but I don't want to write a super-long essay. I am sure more people will provide answers too so that you get an idea of it in general. But trust me, don't compare the future to your past, it will be very different. You are not dust. A life like you mentioned is not uneventful, you just have to wait, as you are just 14 - very, very young.
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reader, PeterNorth  +, writes (20 March 2011):
Hey relax your only 14 just have fun with life, everything will fall into place as you get older. i'm 18 and still unsure what i want to do, it's all good just chill.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2011): i dont get the question but listen dont think your life's dull and boring because really its not. i think i'm pregnant, i'm 14 and it migth be my bfs of his best mates i know it seems un-glamourous, it is. you dont realise how much i've a ruined a friendship just because i'm an idiot !
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