A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My best friend of 5 years committed suicide 2 weeks ago. I understand why she did it, she had alot of trouble in her life, and was in every sense of the word an orphan. The only family she had left was her nieces, who were put into foster care because they wouldn't give them to her. What I want to know, is how do I explain to them that their aunt has died? I arranged a visit to see them next week, because I feel it is important for them, or at least the oldest one to know. I'm having trouble explaining it to myself, how can I explain it to the girls?
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female
reader, XxAnGelXxx  +, writes (28 February 2009):
 Oh gawd, i'm really really sorry for your loss, reading this has actually bought tears to my eyes, I cant begin to imagine how your feeling. One of my dads best friends committed suicided due to his relationship falling apart, leaving behind a wife and baby girl, he was like family to me too.. Sorry i'm going completely off trail here, how old are the children? I'd say that if they're under the age of 10 then maybe you should just tell them that their auntie has gone to live with the angels? Children under or around that age often wont ask for anything more than that. Once they've grown up sure, you can tell them what really happened, im not too sure how but maybe another aunt could help you with that, also im kinda out on ideas if you couldn't pass the gone to live with the angels thing by them, but I hope that somewhat helped:) and remember all the lovely aunts on this site are here for support whenever you need it :) x
A
male
reader, ponyman +, writes (28 February 2009):
Firstly may I express my condolences for your loss, especially under such sad circumstances. A very difficult, and horrible situation to find your self in now, I would imagine.I am wondering why you have been burdened with the responsibility of giving the children this news. I would have thought that they would have been told by the people in who's care they have been entrusted, if it was felt appropriate for them to know.Anyway - to the problem in hand - you give no details of the children's ages, but I would think that most pre-teen aged children would struggle to understand the concept of mental health. I think if I was in your situation then I would tell them that their Aunt had become ill and died as a result, and leave it at that for now - I doubt if they will ask for a clinical diagnosis. If in years to come they want to know more, then you will be older and have had more time to come to terms with the loss yourself and be in a better position to go into further details if it becomes necessary.I wish you well.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2009): Depends on their age and maturity level. If the oldest is you believe is mature, talk to her openly and truthfully, but don't let the others know.
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