A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now, and we've never had a particularly rampant sex life. By all means, we both enjoy showing each other how much we love each other physically, but in the past few months it's been on the decrease.The frequency has been dwindling and he says that he's just too tired every day, which he is. He comes home from work exhausted and just wants to rest for the remainder of the night. We've discussed it and the problem isn't with him finding me unattractive or bad in bed (which were obviously my main concerns), it really is just a lack of energy. We've tried many different things like a proper bed time routine, not having any caffeine after 9pm, but nothing seems to do the trick.I enjoy making love with him, but it seems to happen in 2 week stints (once every 2 weeks or so) - the problem with this is that a) I'm on the pill, so the window of opportunity is decreased by about a week and b) leaving it for such a long time means that it's quite painful the next time that we do. I don't think it would be that bad if I were to get a little *help* from him every now and again to tide me over, but he doesn't even have the energy for that.I just feel a bit unwanted sometimes, because he's not even particularly affectionate any more. I'm at a loss because if I bring it up again, he'll just feel upset.
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (20 October 2009):
He's tired. So instead of worrying about sex at the moment, really spend time being romantinc with each other. Or just focusing on forplay and seeing what happens. He has to understand that you have needs. Also, be aware that it is unlike a young man to be this tired, so what is he dong at work? Or could there be a medical issue?
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