A
female
age
41-50,
*ABYDOL08
writes: how do i control my anger and stop thinking my boyfriend is going to break my heart Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix +, writes (15 September 2010):
Hi there. Try to learn to trust him, unless he gives you reason not to.
The anger you feel is probably due to frustration, that maybe things are not progressing as quickly as you would like them to. Perhaps you are the one who is doing all the giving. He might not be giving of himself into the relationship as much as you. So there is an imbalance. This would make you feel like you not getting back as much as you give.
It sounds like you have some doubts.
Also, don't be too available to him or put him above you in importance. Don't let him think that you are sitting around waiting for him to call.
Try not make him your whole world. This is a big mistake.
Try not to let yourself become emotionally dependent on him, as this puts pressure on him to make you happy. Take him down off the pedestal. Your needs are just as important as his.
It's not up to our partners to make us happy. We are each responsible for our own happiness - no-one else.
It's necessary to have your own friends, as well as interests and hobbies to keep your own life interesting. Many women lose their identify in relationships, and it ends up making them very unhappy, as they feel they have lost so much. So start seeing your friends again, and go out and have coffee and cake from time to time. Laugh and be happy. You need to start having more fun!
You both need some time apart during the week. Just one night a week for a couple of hours, is sufficient. He could see his mates and watch sport on tv and have a couple of beers. And you go out with your girlfriends to see a movie or to a cafe and catch up with each other.
Just don't feel that because you are in a relationship, that you have to be together all day and all night - every single day. That's too stifling. You both need your personal space, it's healthy.
Hope this helps you. Take care and best wishes.
A
female
reader, liny187 +, writes (15 September 2010):
You need to let go that anger with love. Let the past be the past.
...............................
|