A
female
age
30-35,
*osy
writes:I'm meeting my ex boyfriend on Friday, for a chat and a general 'What happened to us' conversation... which we do need because it was all very messy and we haven't spoken in a month ( at all) and not properly since December. It was my fault the rlationship broke down, and I gave him no reason to trust me or stay with me. I'm just wondering if anyone has any ideas how I can build this trusts back up? Or at least, add to it? Or just how I can make sure the atmorphere doesn't go mental? Obv emotions are still flying high and I know it could go horribly wrong so I just want to ensure calmness.. or try to.Anyone ever done this? Has it ever worked? I'm not expecting to get back together, or barely friends but I need todo everything I can, because he is my special someone. Tips please!
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get back together, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Cosy +, writes (18 March 2008):
Cosy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI know but it won't be super intense..
we were together for a year and half, it wasnt just a few months or a flighting fancy. Itwill be a-ok..
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2008): You are too young to start grappling with these big ideas. Just have fun, don't be heavy. If you still like him be surprising, complimentary and have a good laugh. Then he really will wonder what happened to you. A deep, girly kind of intense chat will send him running to the hills!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2008): you can't build trust. It has to be given to you, because it belongs to the other person. thats why it is so precious, because you carry it around with you.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2008): to build trust you need time. you will have to make yourself accountable at all times to him and always speak the truth. If you say you are meeting him somewhere at 5 p.m. do not show up even 2 minutes late! Carry your phone and be accessable....it will not always be like this but for a while it is necessary to build trust. good luck
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A
female
reader, Cosy +, writes (17 March 2008):
Cosy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionnono its not that i don't want anything.
I just don't really deserve anything!
I would love something to happen I'm just not going to gt my hopes up.
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A
female
reader, Skeez +, writes (17 March 2008):
 Hello hun.
Well you havent told us what the situation was that made you broke up, so it might be difficult to help you, but acting normal and casual will probably help.
When you next meet him, approach him with a smile and a friendly hello.
Start off by asking him wht he has been up to. Dont go straight into things about your relationship. Ask him how htings are going with certain things. Then casually bring up the fact about what you did and how sorry you really are for it ending this way. Rememeber to stay calm and be nice to him all the time. Even if he snaps at you or doesnt look to happy, tell him how you regret what you did and that you still really really want to be friends.
Whatever you do hun...its from yur heart and you cant possibly do anything wrong. Just tell him everything you feel and see how it goes. If he cant deal with the truth then theres no point trying to get it in him. Just be nice and friendly all the time.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2008): If you don't want anything from this why bother its just messing with his head. Leave the poor guy be.
Good luck
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