A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hi i was wondering how to boost my sex appeal. I have been with my fiance for 8 years. And i feel she know longer fancys me. She has know interest in sex and doesnt masturbate. I work out with average build. Do most me the house work and all the cooking. Get up to our boy when he wakes in the night cause she needs her 8 hours. She works 4 days a week and i work 5 days a week doing a physical job. Take our kid out weekend mornings so she can rest. Is this not nice and sexy thing to do. In need of some help
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female
reader, Candid Cally  +, writes (25 November 2011):
If your wife doesn't have much energy and is in bed resting frequently, she needs to see her doctor.
A
female
reader, bluecow +, writes (24 November 2011):
 Your being sooo helpful, and I wouldnt want you to be put off doing that BUT its not SEXY its CONSIDERATE.So you do the cooking, alot of the cleaning and give her a break from the kids on a weekend. What part of that turns you on?Aside from me thinking you should set some boundaries and take it in turns with the chores (and weekend lie ins), you asked how to boost your sex appeal.You need to make her remember how sexy you are. Its no different from a woman wanting to be more than just "mother" in her mans eyes. Do men think its sexy when a woman irons his shirts every week or takes the bins out? NAH!Why not:Get granny to take the kid for the weekend (then you can both lie in). Change the bed to something soft and silky. Sprinkle rose petals, run a bath AND order something yummy for dinner. Put some candles on, put a nice shirt on and some nice aftershave. Then just see where the evening take you. If you want to go the whole hog you could buy her some sexy underwear and something nice to wear for your special date night.You need to set aside time for you two as a COUPLE, away from the everyday grind. Set a date night, and do something together. Something you both can make an effort for and something that allows you to explore and get to know each other as individuals again.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2011): Shes a lucky lady to have you, you spoil her and do your bit
As for her not fancying you maybe its just cos you've been together 8 years and are in a rut...try some romance, buy her some sexy undies for xmas and some choclate body sauce...if you can take her to a hotel or B&B for a weekend..
Talk to her as well,tonight, let her know how you feel, tell her you miss sex and being close to her,ask her whats up...you have needs and its selfish of her not to see your point of view.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (24 November 2011):
 It is great things to do, but a relationship works both ways, she should also be doing something's as well to take the stress of you. Does she ever cook for you? Treat you to time to yourself? It works both ways. Just make sure she is not walking all over you. I guess you need to talk to her about this, it could be just a case that she has lost her libido. You don't mention how old your son is, but I guess he is still young when he is still getting up through the night, have the problems just started since she had your son? It could be a case that now she is a mother she has lost her libido or maybe she doesn't feel sexy any more. You need to talk to her and ask her what is wrong, and reassure her that you still find her attractive. Maybe organise a baby sitter for once a week so you and your girlfriend can have a night to yourself. Take her out show her a good time and the both of you can have some space to yourself.
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