A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So here's the thing, I have this friend (female) that I'm actually really into, I see her about 2 times a week (but in a group of friends, not one on one). She's coming to a house party on this week, I just want to know how to pull her aside, out of earshot from others and say hey, I think you're amazing. I'm pretty confident there are some mutual feelings, but, I'm not a mind reader. So, advice away! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Abella  +, writes (16 May 2011):
 Don't try to hard. Find an opportunity to look at her, smile at her. That's enough for starters. Then watch for an opportunity when she is on her own. Comment on something that is not threatening to her. Even if it is that you like a particular piece of music you can hear at the time. Then ask her an open question, such as 'what sort of music is your favorite?' Or 'how did you meet ... (person who is putting on the party)'
Don't just launch into something as full on as 'I think you are amazing'
Though you can get mildly flirty like noticing her hair and having a strong need to touch her hair briefly and smiling into her eyes and tell her you 'I love how your hair looks' (especially if she has made an extra special effort to make it look good)
Take it slowly, yes flirt, but don't overwhelm her at first.
Good luck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2011): I think these things work better when they're not expected so I would just pull her out and tell her how you feel without being a creeper. Simple and honest works best something like "hey I really like you and I was wondering if you would go out with me?" Smile and see what she does.
It might just be me but I'm a sucker for a guy with guts and maybe she is too. Be brave. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, hannah76  +, writes (16 May 2011):
 Hello,
Based on what you say, this is a high risk to ask her out. What signs do you have that there are mutual feelings? I don't recommend telling her she is amazing. You tell her that when you are an item. This is high risk. She may feel it odd that you take her aside because it is out of the blue.
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A
male
reader, jp23 +, writes (16 May 2011):
1. chat with her for 5 minutes or so.
2. Then ask if you can get her phone number
3. txt her, asking her if she wants to get a cup of coffee later on that week.
4. meet up with her there and have coffee and chat.
-if everything is running smoothly and she takes you up on that offer.
5. ask if she wants to go to the movies,gym,tennis, beach, or even church. Find out things that intrest her. does she like the in doors or out doors.
6. be your self lol, make sure that you are always trying to chat. So there shouldn't be more than a few seconds of silence between you. oc-ward silence is no good lol. If you have stories thats always good, funny or just intresting. maybe something one of your friends did, or even you did. trying to find things that both intrest you and her in the conversation.
7. in the end what are you looking for, a relationship, open relationship, or no strings attached?
If serious, then you want to try and build a relationship, if anything els you dont want to put to much into it.
In anycase if you are txt, no more than 2 txt unless its in parts like (1/2) then up to 3 I would say. You dont want to over whelm her to where she feels like you are becoming to clingy. even if your sending a lot of txt back and forth, one or two back and forth is ok, but a slight difference in repetition can brake the seqaence and make a person think your obsest or clingy. both are really bad lol. But if U send a txt and 2 days pass and you hear nothing then you have to send a txt/call both.
anyways if you have any specific questions about anything els just ask. :) click on my pro an leave a message.
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