A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I feel really stupid asking this question.I am a math tutor. I go to my pupil's homes and give private lessons. I do it on the side and they pay me in cash. My prices are reasonable (ok, on the lower side, times are hard, but that is my decision).A month ago I got a new pupil. I discussed money with her mother at the begining and everything was fine. Now, I felt so stuoid for not BEING CLEAR on tis issue. When I wasn't paid after my first visit, I thought that the mother (whom I haven't seen since since she works all the time) has decided pay me after each month (for lessons in total). However, this wasn't the case! I have done five lessons so far and she hasn't paid me. Since yesterday was the first lesson in February, I thought she would. So, now I have to react.I was thinking about sending her an SMS, saying (rough translation):"(usual niceties) The first month of working with Annie went well. We have got to know one another and made a considerable progress in the predefined program. She works hard and I am really happy with the improvement she made. Furthermore, this coming Tuesday will be our sixth lesson, I would appreciate it if you could leave for me XXX € in cash. Thank youin advance" In French it sounds muuuuch better, but I am not used to doing this sort of thing and it always feel as if I am being pushy.By the way, I was recomended to this family by a mother whose son I have been teaching for 10 years.ANy advice?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2016): Thank you again for all of you answers!I've just seen the last one from Honeypie. It never crossed my mind to look for a contract! But I should have... the situations I've put myself into... totally my fault.I never had the guts to do what HoneyPie did. I just kept reminding them until I got paid.The worst part is that they always have money prepared for other tutors (because they obviously know how to stand up for themselves). A few weeks ago, before my very eyes, one mom paid a piano teacher and had no cash left to pay me! She just sheepishly asked if it was okay to pay me next week. Guess what I said? Sure...Now, here's what happened with the most recent problem. A few hours after I had sent her the text, she responded with a very long one. It turns out that she left money for me but her kid, my pupil, forgot to give it to me. It is possible. But it is also possible that she forgot to tell the kid. What I find strange however is the fact that when she found out that I didn't take the money, that she didn't call me, or texted me. But I'm probably thinking about what I would have done...For some families it is easier to pay me once a month, but I don't like it. If something happens, I can lose the money I've earned.It's a good lesson for me, and thank you again for your help and support!!!
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (5 February 2016):
 IF she doesn't contact or pay you ASAP, there will be no more classes given by you.
And in the future, write a little contract ( you can look up the standard tutor contract) print out two copies - give one to the parent and have them fill out and sign one for you.
http://www.tutoring-expert.com/support-files/sample_tutoring_contract.pdf
What you can ALSO add in there is payments - if you want to be paid EVERY time you visit to tutor (let's say it's once a week, then state that)
Make sure they know UP FRONT and BEFORE you start tutoring how much and how often you expect to be paid.
I tutored a kid in college, his mom was NOTORIOUSLY bad at remembering having cash for me. And I had to let her know (after she owed me 2 weeks) that I would NOT spend 2 hours in a Tuesday teaching her son English if she kept forgetting. It wasn't nice to SAY that to a grown person (I was 22 she was in her late 30's?) but you know? It did the trick. She would slip up and forget and just pay me more the next time. It wasn't because she tried to short change me or cheat me, she was just forgetful about it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2016): Thank you so much for your answers and your encouragement!
I tried calling her, but she never picks up. I don't take it personally. She's busy. I didn't leave a message because it would be too complicated.
As she didn't call back, I sent her a text. No reply yet. It's been several hours. Now, that is something I find weird. My text was not offensive. I am not saying that she did something wrong. I pointed out that we didn't work out the details regarding the payment and that I would like to be paid at the end of each lesson.
Hopefully it'll be ok.
I know you're right when you say that I should get up and leave if the money isn't there the next time. For me it doesn't come naturally. I need to make myself do it.
Thank you again!
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (3 February 2016):
 Your message sounds good. Hopefully her mind has just been elsewhere, could it be possible that the student has been giving the money and has not passed it on to you? Either way if you do not want to call her mother, then send the text message. It sounds professional to me. But yes add that you would like to be paid weekly. Or maybe you could even ask her what payment arrangements would suit her and discuss it. You need to be in charge here, as it is your time and money. Do not let anyone take you for granted.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (3 February 2016):
 OK, if you ask me, I'd say just pick up the phone and talk to her. I always feel that messages are lost in translation and if she doesn't respond or is ambiguous in her reply, then it just keeps getting drawn out into a meaningless exchange of texts with nothing being clear.
Just call her, tell her whatever you've thought of writing in the text and mention the payment issue. "Mrs. Jones, there's this small issue that I thought I should bring up. I've done 5 lessons in total with Annie and I actually prefer payments after each lesson, that's how I do it with all my students." See what she says after that...I'm sure she doesn't know that you prefer being paid after each lesson and maybe would have paid you in the first week of February, for your classes in January.
You're not being pushy OP, you're just being professional. Don't feel hesitant or bad about this, there's nothing to feel that way about.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (3 February 2016):
 Your text idea sounds good, you could add in that payment is usually made each visit .... this coming Tuesday will be out sixth lesson, it would be appreciated if you could leave XXX$ (6 lessons worth) in cash for the period (date to date) and make arrangements for me to be paid at each lesson from then on. Thanking you in advance
I know, I know it feels pushy, but you have to do it. If there is no payment when you get there on Tuesday, don't give a lesson, just ask the student if their mother had left anything for you, if they say no, then make an excuse and leave.
Good luck, please come back and let us know if all goes well
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2016): Some people! I think you sound very nice and the start was good. Not only that, ask her to pay you after each lesson from now on. It could be just an overlook, as i cant imagine she would avoid paying you especially as she was reffered by another person who knows you.
In a future be firm with people, and state your rules from the very beginning. This is you who needs to be paid, and its your rules
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