A
male
age
30-35,
*EAL GUY
writes:ok so I have never asked a girl out before and I have dated around 10 girls since i was in middle school and until now that i recently graduated high school.. some relationships were not serious and we were just fooling around i have not dated a girl since i got out of high school( which is 2 years) like now that I'm more mature I want to be with a girl that i can be happy with and not just any girl..so this time i'm choosing carefully because i want to be serious now and have a good relationship...but the thing is that all the girls that i been with have asked me out, I have never asked a girl out in my life and I'm like shy like i don't know how it feels to be rejected by a girl because it has never happened to me..so I just need some advice and help..i would appreciate it
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female
reader, RedAthena +, writes (17 August 2011):
 You are just asking a girl to get to know you, spend time with you and enjoy your company. You are not proposing marriage! :)
Rejection is part of the dating game. It will help you grow thicker skin with practice.
Remember that when a girl says no, it does not mean she is rejecting YOU. It may be bad timing for her, you are not her type, etc. If she turns you down, then would you want to date her anyway?
Asking someone out is just a filtering process. You are sorting out who is and is not companionship material.
Invite a girl along to things you normally do anyway! Invite a girl to something new you want to experience.
Take the stress off of yourself to immediately ask someone out on a date, but look at them as a potential friend you *might* want to ask out later.
You will know if the chemistry and "click" is there and you will just find yourself asking "Hey, would you like to do/see/eat with me?"
Good Luck!
A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (17 August 2011):
 Well you definitely need to try to ask women out because you can't solely rely on them asking you...especially if the girl is shy herself. Then what happens is you both miss out on an opportunity to get to know each other- because no one is doing the approaching. Girls want you to meet them, court them, and approach with confidence.
I shared a tip before I learned when I was selling cologne, about how my supervisor told me it was a numbers game to make a sale. But I want to express something additional...another analogy if I may. You need to step up to the plate to hit a home run. Granted you may strike out many times, but what would baseball be like if say Babe Ruth didn't want to go up and bat- for fear that he may strike out? You have to have the same mentality as great baseball hitters when it comes to meeting women.
And be process-oriented rather than goal-oriented. Approach with the idea to have fun, flirt, and to be charming. And if the girl gives you her number great, if not, then say it was great talking to her, and just move on to the next potential match. There could be many reasons for a rejection (too much to go into here), but if you be process-oriented you'll fear the "R word" a lot less.
Hope this helps! :^)
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A
female
reader, RoseLovex  +, writes (17 August 2011):
 Hello:)
First of all as a girl,i can say not as many guys get rejected as you think, believe it or not girls dont like to reject boys.
Secondly, if you make very very good friends with the girl first shes bound to like you more than a friend.
Just simply go up to her mayby give her a hug, have a casual chat first so the atmosphere is calm, take her somewhere quiet so its all relaxed and simply say : *her name* i have been thinking about you alot lately, i cant seem to get you off my mind, i know we are really good friends, but i was just wondering if mayby you wanted to be more than friends?
and if she says no, just say ok thats fine, its totally up to you, so you may be embarresed inside but you dont show it on the outside. then simply tell her you have to go( even if you dont) give her a hug then leave, this will make her think about all thats happened.
i hope ive helped. update me :) x
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A
male
reader, BJacobs +, writes (17 August 2011):
 Its super easy dude! The main thing you have to do is forget about being nervious and unsure, just be confident.
People go on dates all the time its really more of a casual thing now. As for actually doing the asking out part, just again, be confident and ask for her number (if you just met her you can use the cheezy line "i know this is forward but..." or i dont do this often but..."). Rejection shouldnt be on your mind because she hopefully wont flat out deny you, she will probably just give you a wrong number or not answer the phone(unless she is a bitch in which case you shouldnt date her anyway).
I kinda am jealous of you because im stuck dating in high school where social circles are the main deciding factor on who you date. Anywayz i hope i helped you some and that things work out for the best!
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