A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: How can I aproach a guy I dont know? I dont talk about anyone special right now but I have a terrible fear of negative evaluation. I look good, I has a very modern clothing style and generally Im super talkative. But when it comes to talk to someone I dont know, especially a guy I like, I blush and stutter and think he wont pay any attention to me and just give up. I need your advise. If I see a guy in the university hall, or at supermarket and I really like him, what to do?
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female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (24 April 2017):
There is nothing more off-putting than someone who doesn't acknowledge your presence, so, for a first step, just make eye contact, smile and say "Hello". Unless someone is deep in thought, they will usually return the smile and the greeting.
Next time you see them, smile again and say "Hello. Here we are again."
People are always flattered if you say something nice to them or ask their advice, so say something like "I just had to tell you, your hair cut looks amazing" or "Have you any idea which of these is the best one?"
You are making the mistake of thinking of these guys in terms of boyfriend material as soon as you speak to them. Think of them as human beings and potential friends. Some will respond positively, some may not. Remember, their response is not just about YOU but about where THEY are.
As a first challenge, see how many guys you don't know you can smile at today, and count how many smile back. Tomorrow build up to greeting the ones who smile back. Be friendly, be open, be approachable. Above all, have fun.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (23 April 2017):
Start by saying hi and smile. If he responds in a positive manner (says hi back and smiles). Just start with that.
Most people won't REJECT a hi or hello. So you are "safe" there.
If they seem interested you could tell them your name and/or ask them theirs. Compliment them on their shirt or whatnot.
Make the first little interaction SHORT and SWEET. Something they WILL remember along with your face and smile. Who knows the next time you run into them THEY might approach you first.
Look up small talk. Practice it with friends and even random strangers. It's a GREAT skill to have. To be able to converse fairly easily with people REGARDLESS of being interested or not.
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